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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: FusionX
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Crack, the moment the tentacle was cut, what I realized was.
The gap between myself and Robert was considerable.
I had never even thought about how strong he would be, but still… I didn’t know he would be stronger than borrowing the power of the Four Dragons.
The pain accumulated in my body was constantly growing.
The pain accumulated as I recalled memories was substantial.
My heart was gouged out, my intestines were pulled out, and I couldn’t concentrate on the fight itself due to the stinging pain choking my neck.
It was the pain Robert had experienced.
I didn’t know why I was experiencing it.
If I were to explain this, wouldn’t the word karma be the most fitting?
Karma, Theresa smiled bitterly as she recalled that word.
The gap with Robert was gradually narrowing.
Each time Robert swung his sword, the mana that bloomed cut off other tentacles, and the power that seemed to be always full was slowly disappearing.
There was no hesitation in his swing.
Maybe it was because of what I said.
He had erased his hesitation at my words that I had never loved him even once, which had no meaning to me.
I laughed with a snort as I briefly met his eyes.
I didn’t know why old memories came to mind in this situation.
Whether it was especially memorable, or whether I longed for that time now.
What I couldn’t deny now was that Robert had sincerely loved me.
So the thought that bloomed was the letter I had read before.
The letter Robert had sent me when we first met, which could only be the same no matter what life he led.
Wasn’t it written before his regression began?
Since it was also the first time I had received a letter, it might have been especially memorable.
To be honest, I’m ashamed of our last meeting.
Because I didn’t want to show you my crying like that.
Crunch, Robert’s eyes narrowed as he cut off the tentacles rising from the ground.
Theresa’s momentum had weakened a bit.
Why?
I didn’t know the reason.
However, it was certain that an opportunity to penetrate would soon come.
The mana dwelling in my body rotated and surged.
Like flames, the burning mana slowly began to engulf the surrounding space.
The abilities Theresa gained while absorbing the power of the Four Dragons were similar to the race called demons.
I’d have to look into how she absorbed the power of the Four Dragons, but for now, wasn’t getting closer the priority?
Should I say you understood me rather than empathized?
You smiled for me, approached me warmly, so for now.
I want to say thank you first.
There was no hesitation.
I had no hesitation at all about putting an end to this relationship.
Even if she understood all the pain I had suffered, in the end, Theresa would die by my hand.
I didn’t wish for repentance or regret.
Rather, it would be better if she disappeared cleanly.
I thought it would be better if she disappeared now.
Although it might be something only I was agonizing over, Theresa was an existence that made me recall the past.
The time when I repeated foolish things, the time when I found faults in myself for every situation.
Crunch, I ran while cutting off the tentacles digging into my arm.
As mana seeped into the wound, it slowly began to heal.
Although not as much as holy power, there was no problem stopping the bleeding.
I ran.
Forgetting about the pain, I bit off the tentacles trying to stop me with my teeth.
Cutting with my sword, barely calming my heart that was beating as if it would burst, I kicked the ground and moved forward.
Actually, I don’t know what to write either, so I’m just rambling and writing anything.
I’ve learned a lot about this kind of refinement since I was young, but I guess practice is different.
Suddenly, a laugh escaped.
Theresa slowly wiped the corners of her mouth and reached out her hand towards Robert again.
The tentacles that stretched out in the air strongly pushed Robert away.
Although it was surprising that he blocked it again with his sword and charged, Theresa herself knew well that this was just buying time.
But why was she blocking this?
The futility that had bloomed in her chest at some point was a very subtle emotion.
Until yesterday, she was burning with the desire for revenge.
Saying she would definitely kill Robert, didn’t she even sacrifice children as offerings without any hesitation?
Crunch, a hollow laugh escaped at the bones that broke even when she stayed still.
“…Ahaha.”
The pain gained from facing Robert’s memories didn’t end.
The pain that flowed in all day long, it got worse and more painful.
Her clenched teeth began to shatter as they ground against each other.
Humans are truly cunning, aren’t they?
Theresa knew well that she was just ordinary.
That was why she used others and tried to revive her family by borrowing the Taylor name.
But even knowing all these facts, was it possible to say that she still tried to love that person?
She thought it was impossible unless one was a fool or an idiot.
But even if Robert was such a person, that wouldn’t be the case.
Why would she have been deceived by a fool or an idiot?
However, Robert thought that was the right thing to do.
She couldn’t understand.
Even in the midst of this pain gradually worsening, it was the same that she couldn’t fully understand Robert’s thoughts.
If it were her, she would have killed him long ago.
Before it even came to this situation, she probably would have killed everyone.
I’m a bit weak and more naive than others.
I don’t have a strong side like my sister, and I’m not perfect in every aspect like my father.
Even if you ask me to pick something I’m good at, I wouldn’t be able to easily pick one.
I’m that kind of person.
I have many shortcomings, so if you’re close to me, you might be disappointed a lot.
I knew I had many shortcomings.
It was the same when I first regressed.
I was able to endure repeated deaths without getting tired in order to fill those lacking points and make up for the parts I thought were insufficient.
Perhaps my strength was in this mental aspect.
Enduring dozens of deaths, and the fact that all memories become those of one person.
It was a lonely and miserable thing.
So there were many times when I went a little crazy.
It was not easy to cut off your own arm.
There were times when I became so devastated that I couldn’t do anything, even taking my own life.
I endured it and came this far.
It would be a lie to say I didn’t think about the next regression.
As my relationship with Adriana deepened, as I met Adele again, as I became a little more intimate with Miragen.
I made a vow to finally make this life the end point.
This was the end.
If I killed Theresa this time, I would never face her again.
If we met, wouldn’t it be in hell?
Robert, who smiled bitterly, swung his sword towards the void again.
It was not the void.
As the tentacles losing momentum were cut off, the gap with Theresa had narrowed significantly.
It wasn’t far.
Until the sword pierced that heart.
You may be surprised by my too straightforward words.
However, I want you to know that this is not a letter I’m writing on a momentary impulse.
Haa-
Robert’s breathing was getting rough, but it was the same for Theresa.
It was certain that she had little strength left to use force.
Perhaps two more times, and if even that attack failed, her chest would probably be pierced by that sword.
But why was she hesitating?
In this situation where it wouldn’t be enough to reach out and block the attack, why was she hesitating for a moment?
As the content of the letter she had seen at some point came to mind, there was an emotion that slowly filled her heart.
She was loved.
With not a hint of falsehood or deception in that heart.
She was simply loved purely when there was a time.
So was she harboring these feelings?
Now that she was sorry, now that the moment had come when her body that had felt all this pain was crumbling.
Was she finally harboring a feeling of being sorry?
“Ha.”
When I went directly to the Moon Tower and asked about the weather, they said it was the only day when it wouldn’t rain no matter what.
So I’m sending this invitation.
It’s a garden that my mother and I have been tending since I was young.
I planted violets especially, so I wanted to show you in person.
Even thinking about it herself, it was absurd, so Theresa’s hand slipped weakly as she snorted.
The tentacles that had been heading towards Robert also crumbled weakly.
Tap tap, the sound of footsteps running towards her without hesitation was heard.
The mansion that had been affected by her power gradually disappeared, and then the sky was visible through the completely open ceiling.
I was crying then, and you pitied me.
But next time.
Whoosh.
Flames engulfed Robert’s sword.
The moonlight was obscured by clouds, so only dark shadows filled the space below the mansion.
The mana that burned through the shadows rose and headed straight for her heart.
Theresa’s gaze was on the tip of the sword.
What would Robert’s expression be like as he thrust the sword towards her?
Would he cry like when they first met, or would he be smiling like when they met again in the garden?
But it was just expressionless, and the corners of her mouth twisted at the futility that enveloped her body.
Blood gushed from her mouth as the sword pierced her heart.
The tentacles wriggling on the ground crumbled, and only her limply hanging body fell powerlessly towards the ground.
What hung on Theresa’s lips was a smile.
The clear smile that no one could deny must have flowed from memories.
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Theresa’s body slowly began to disintegrate.
The sword stuck in her heart also disintegrated, but another sword was already ready in case of unexpected situations.
She would probably die and disappear soon.
It was refreshing, but on the other hand, it was bitter.
Because I didn’t have a deep emotional grudge against Theresa to call it revenge, and this was just killing her to prevent any possible variables in the future.
I hoped she would die in pain.
However, it seemed she had already suffered that pain enough.
The wounds that appeared on her body that repeated regeneration and injury were familiar.
Because I had long realized that she was receiving the pain I had suffered in previous regressions like karma.
What on earth was the Moonstone I possessed?
I never thought it would not only repeat regression but also affect others and make them recall memories.
Theresa’s eyes, which had been vomiting blood, turned towards me.
It was different from the first time.
Her eyes that had been simply murky had a slightly clearer light, like when I first met her.
“…I wish you would kill me quickly, but that would be difficult.”
“Because you crossed the line too much.”
Her regrown bones shattered again, and her intestines popped out and were torn apart on their own.
It was terrible even to look at, but Theresa’s expression was nonchalant.
Although I could feel her flinch occasionally, her gaze was still on me.
She, who had vomited blood countless times, stopped vomiting for a moment and slowly moved her lips.
“I think you know, but you’re a really foolish person. If you had killed me long ago, none of this would have happened. You… know that too, right?”
“I know.”
“…If it were me, I wouldn’t have died 100 times. There’s a limit to being stupid, but 100 times-.”
Cough.
The blood that burst out from all directions flowed and formed a pool on the ground.
As her power disappeared, the mansion also disappeared, leaving only an empty estate.
Raindrops began to fall one by one from the heavily clouded sky.
Plop.
Plop-
As I looked up at the sky, which seemed like it would rain at any moment, Theresa’s voice reached my ears.
“Do you think I’ll regret it? What I did to you.”
“Not at all.”
“Then do you think I’ll be sorry?”
“…Not at all.”
Then Theresa, who burst into laughter with a snort, smiled slightly.
After laughing for a while looking at the sky, she wiped her face like that and turned her gaze to me.
The light in her eyes was dim.
Transparent, as if it couldn’t contain even a bit of light.
“I’m sorry.”
I turned my head at the sudden voice.
Because it was an unexpected word, a word I never even thought I would hear from Theresa.
For a moment, I blankly looked at her.
“I just… felt like I had to say this.”
Her lips, which were gradually turning pale, parted with difficulty.
It was as if she was squeezing out her last strength.
Her body, which scattered like dust, began to flutter in the air.
Her body that had been constantly injured and regenerated stopped, and only her cold, stiffened flesh was visible.
Her lips that had moved countless times stopped like that.
Even the sound of her breathing that had been heard in this space for a while ceased.
Eventually, only her empty eyes touched the void.
“Theresa.”
There was no answer even when I called her name.
She had closed her mouth after uttering words I had never expected.
There was no way for an answer to come back again.
Because she was dead.
Only the sword stuck in her heart was left stuck in the ground.
Her mouth that had been moving until just now, her eyes that had been looking at the void, had now scattered like dust and disappeared towards the sky.
She was dead.
Theresa was definitely dead.
Since I had stabbed the sword into her heart myself, it was certain that she was dead.
The woman who had recalled my regression was dead.
I had killed the woman I loved in my first life with my own hands.
That was the reality.
Suddenly, laughter escaped me and I looked at the sky with my lips twisted.
Swish-
My body was drenched by the pouring rain.
Her blood had pooled thickly on the ground and flowed with the rainwater, and before long, even the place where Theresa had been lying became indistinguishable.
Water dripped from my drenched hair, plop, and flowed down my chest.
Touching my chest, touching my arm.
The stream of water that flowed like that fell down my fingers.
I couldn’t find the moon in the gloomy sky.
Only the dark clouds that poured down rain were plenty, and there was only a silence where no light could be found.
I thought I would feel refreshed if I killed Theresa.
Because I had never sent Theresa off like this in all my past.
Thinking that everything would go well now, didn’t I think I could celebrate in my own way after killing her like that?
Strangely, my chest felt heavy.
No matter how many times I tapped my chest, that heaviness didn’t disappear.
-The weather is nice today. I read in the letter, did you really go all the way to the Moon Tower to ask about the weather?
-I thought if we met, it should be the day with the best weather.
I laughed with a snort at the memory that briefly came to mind.
It was different from that day.
It was different from the day when the violets were in full bloom, the day when that summer was about to begin.
The season when it rained at the end of winter.
The season when the violets that had shone purple for a while withered and disappeared.
Feeling the chill from the rain soaking my body, I looked at the void and closed my eyes quietly like that, holding my breath.
I hated rainy days.
Because whenever I recalled the day I died, it was a day when it rained miserably.
The sound of rain heard in a damp, humid, and stuffy space evoked emotions I had forgotten.
So I hated it.
When I was getting rained on like this.
Because it looked like I was crying.
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No matter how much you deny it, a connection is a connection regardless of the form. That’s just human.
It feels as though Theresa wasn’t even trying to fight or defend herself. She just calmly accepted her demise, well aware of one fact.
At one point, she was truly loved by someone.
No matter how much of a despicable person she is, I strangely sympathize with her. But it will never justify the atrocities she committed.
Goodbye Theresa. You were loved.
I do sure hope Kaitel, who’s behind all this, suffers a grueling and miserable end at Robert’s hands.
I wish there was a what if story, where Theresa regresses after being killed now, and she goes to 0th loop…curious about her stance at that time, maybe she would have faced MC with sincerity.
Hot take:
This could’ve been done better.
I really liked the lead up to her self-realization, especially with the letters.
Here’s the thing though, she was painted as a completely, inhumane, cunning person. Except for her act of showing care to her brother, she was barely built upon as a character.
I know this is fiction, but genuinely speaking, the fact it took theresa remembering the regressions to ultimately realize the letters, is very odd to me.
Sincerity can be felt from a mile away. How come she never even, stop to think, or very slightly had, a speck of remorse for her actions, especially after all of those letter
It’s 1: Either you paint her as a complete cunning psychopath just like Yuria,
Or 2: You actually build on her character, showcasing her inner feelings everytime she manipulated the Taylors, and to place more backstory, and emotion in her actions.
Her end right now just felt bland.
Idk It’s not satisfying and I don’t think it was meant to be. Theresa definitely was cartoonishly evil/stupid, I don’t really understand how it took her becoming a demon and recalling a hundred lives to realize the MC’s feelings. I’m guessing it’s cause only at this point was she at her lowest point in all of her iterations, so backed into a corner, attacked by the person she was deeply connected with she finally realized her mistakes.
I think it at least was a good ending to her story instead of being a cheap villain like in the beginning, killed off in a single breath like I was expecting at first. But could’ve been handled a bit better in the beginning to not make her change so dissonant.
Not gonna lie, this half-redemption shit is just not it. Either do it right or leave it be, but what am I supposed to feel at this point? I am not even the least bit sorry or understanding for Therisa, but neither is this a satisfying revenge.
Author really fumbled this entire arc IMO.