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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: FusionX
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When I first heard the name Moonstone, there was a strange sensation I felt.
Should I say it felt like something that existed at one point but had completely disappeared at some point?
What I felt when I tried to read the memories related to it was a sense of incongruity, even after repeated thoughts, it was strange that the memory was completely empty as if it never existed at all.
“…It existed, but it doesn’t exist.”
The peculiarity possessed by artifacts, that was the problem I couldn’t reach even after researching for over a decade.
What characteristics did the artifacts created by the goddess of the moon and the Four Dragons have?
The Moonstone that Robert Taylor had described was about ‘regression’.
Turning back time and living while endlessly repeating a certain point.
Even though I didn’t know why he asked about such a terrible punishment, it was true that I had a strange feeling about the name Moonstone.
The same feeling as what I had just muttered.
It definitely existed in this world, but at some point, its existence had completely disappeared.
[If that Moonstone really exists, what I’m most curious about is its effect on the surroundings. Whether the people around can recall memories of the regression……]
Artifacts cannot simply affect only individuals.
How could something with the power to reverse time and stop space only affect one person?
Moreover, regression means turning back the time of not just one person, but everyone.
If my prediction is correct.
Arwen, who picked up a pen, began to write down the contents she had calculated herself on paper.
Her hypothesis about regression had been somewhat established.
It must have been because Robert Taylor brought up the story of the Moonstone that it gained substance.
“Resonance.”
A phenomenon that occurs when the power of an artifact can no longer endure after its effect has been manifested for a certain period of time, causing it to collapse.
I had already seen it a few times through other artifacts, so if regression through the Moonstone was possible, that artifact would also experience this effect.
The stopped time could not stay in that place forever.
Since the nature of time is to flow originally, it is its essence to eventually move from its place and try to return.
Arwen, who tapped her temple, narrowed her eyes.
If Robert Taylor had really repeated regression through something called the Moonstone.
If it wasn’t the first time, but he had already repeated it many times…
“They would probably be able to recall it.”
People other than Robert would slowly begin to recall those memories.
Memories were like colors that gradually seeped in.
Like slowly dyeing a white canvas, the memories that emerged were far from coming all at once.
They would probably return slowly.
The memories would return so naturally that the person wouldn’t even notice, and at some point, they would realize they had regained all their memories.
“…If regression is repeated, how many times will the memories return?”
The formula drawn in the air moved with mana, and a white line was drawn on the glowing pentagram.
When the hand of Arwen, a woman who wouldn’t be strange to be called the ‘pinnacle’ in the study of magic, stopped in the air.
Her eyes were just narrowly open.
To be precise, it was because she couldn’t believe her own calculations.
Because she didn’t want to believe it.
“101 times.”
Can a person endure 100 deaths?
Even if they endured it, their mental state wouldn’t be sound.
It was just an inference.
Based on the fact that he asked her about regression and the Moonstone artifact, she had only estimated the number by making her own hypothesis.
But if this number was close to the truth.
Arwen, who smiled bitterly for a moment, stared at the void.
The Robert Taylor she met didn’t show any signs of wavering.
That was the problem.
It meant that the inner self of a person who looked fine on the outside had already reached a state where it wouldn’t be strange for it to collapse.
It seemed that a bit more investigation was needed regarding the Moonstone.
If a little more time passed, even Robert’s mere approach could revive past memories.
If such a thing happened, at least it wouldn’t matter if a few people in the empire broke down.
The door of the general store run by her closed, and a bluish light began to swirl in the curtained space.
A space filled with mana, it seemed that this general store wouldn’t reopen for a few months anyway.
For the time being, it would be better to live as the magician ‘Arwen’.
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Although I saw Theresa, I don’t think I’ll go find her first.
There’s no reason to move unless she sends some signal, and I came with Adriana at her request anyway.
It was true that I had somehow become her guard.
The reason Verod had tacitly allowed this role without saying anything was because my skills were decent.
But if I left alone and disappeared somewhere, even those who thought well of me would be puzzled.
If I met Theresa, there was no way I would return unscathed.
I thought I might die or get severely injured.
I wasn’t afraid of dying.
But what I was thinking about was after killing Theresa.
I didn’t know what emotions I would feel.
When I try to kill Theresa, if she regrets the things she had repeatedly done herself, would I feel a little relieved?
Even if that’s the case, I think the emotions I would feel would be far from exhilaration or relief.
It would be complicated.
Enough that it wouldn’t be strange if my head exploded right away.
I sweated enough to soak my head and wiped the sweat with a towel.
I had been in this state ever since I saw Theresa.
I would swing my sword until I collapsed from exhaustion, and when I was about to collapse, I would finally lie on the ground and quietly look at the sky.
This made me feel a little better.
Not being able to do anything rather helped empty my complicated mind.
After lying like that and looking at the sky for a long time, I suddenly raised my head at the sound of footsteps approaching.
Under the dark sky, the brightly shining white light made me realize who it was right away.
“You were here. I heard a sound and came.”
“Isn’t it dangerous? Don’t come alone next time, bring paladins with you.”
“The paladins are always secretly hiding behind me. I know everything.”
I had long known that Adriana had been watching me for a while.
To be precise, she had been constantly watching me since I saw Theresa and returned.
Was my dark expression that obvious?
Since what she saw was my inner self, it could be that I couldn’t hide it even if I wanted to.
As I got up from lying down, I tapped the spot next to me.
I had already used mana to blow away the sweat I had shed.
Normally, I would just let it flow, but it wasn’t polite to do that next to Adriana.
Adriana, who carefully sat down following the sound I made, soon realized she was right next to me and flinched her shoulders.
“Is it because I’m too close?”
“It’s not that. It’s just that you seem to be having a hard time these days.”
“I didn’t think I was showing it that much.”
“The world I see is a little different from what Robert sees. When we went out together last time, did something trouble you?”
I laughed softly at that cautious question.
It sounded like she was blaming herself.
From her perspective, since I had changed after going out with her, she must think there was a problem.
It wasn’t Adriana’s fault.
If I had to say, it was my fault for not being able to judge coldly.
“You don’t need to blame yourself. This is my personal problem.”
“…Is that so?”
“It will probably be resolved soon. So you don’t need to worry.”
If I kill Theresa with my own hands, I think this worry itself will be resolved.
There was no need for Adriana to be concerned.
This was the first time I had a connection with her, and it was too trivial a matter for her, who had done nothing wrong to me, to worry about.
But Adriana quietly looked at me.
Her slightly tightly closed mouth seemed to deny what I had said.
The voice that came from her mouth that eventually opened was a bit loud.
As if she was angry, a blunt voice unlike her usual self was heard.
“Even if it’s a decision made by you, I don’t think everything is right.”
“What-”
“Even if you try to take on everything alone, it can’t always go in a good direction. You already know that, don’t you? That not everything is achieved by not telling anyone and moving forward alone.”
That voice was quite resolute, so I was momentarily taken aback by her unusual attitude.
My lips, which were trying to answer something, didn’t open as I thought.
Because her words seemed to pierce right through my feelings.
As if she knew everything and was pointing out me trying to do everything alone.
“Sometimes, really sometimes. I think it’s okay to be honest and let it out. Even if it’s such an absurd thing that others can’t believe, wouldn’t there be at least one person who would believe it?”
It was a fundamental statement.
Anyone can say it, but the first person to say this obvious thing to me was Adriana.
I felt a strange surge of emotion.
Looking at the woman who was the first to say these obvious words to me, I slowly wiped my face.
My regression was too absurd.
If one person was repeating the same time forever, moreover, who would believe that they repeated death just to gain the trust of those around them?
But now I just wanted to put an end to this regression.
Although I had the purpose of killing the Crown Prince, I had no regrets even if I died in the process.
Rather, if death approached, I would just smile.
Hoping that this would be my last death, I might smile at the rest that had finally come.
In the past, I might have told Adriana about my regression after hearing these words.
But not anymore.
Because I wished for death, I didn’t want anyone to have such lingering feelings.
I smiled bitterly for a moment.
The moon in the sky was always pale, so I quietly looked at it and slowly opened my mouth.
“There’s not much to talk about. I’ll be completely honest with you, but it’s not that big of a concern.”
“Really?”
“Of course. Why would I lie? I said we were friends before, so I hope I wasn’t the only one thinking that.”
“N-no, that’s not it.”
It was a lie.
Being completely honest was always a lie, as usual.
It wasn’t good to lie to someone.
Even while smiling like this, I couldn’t smile comfortably, it was like wearing a mask.
“…Well, I think it’s no big deal now. I think it’s a concern I can just let out now.”
“Then that’s a relief.”
It became heavier with each word I uttered.
The shackles binding me would torment me until I died.
The closer I got to someone, the more I moved towards my own death.
These shackles placed on me would gradually add to their weight.
But that was the path I had chosen.
Even if the truth about this was revealed and I was hated, even if the person who had a connection with me turned their back on me.
It meant I could endure it because I had chosen it.
I stared at Adriana’s face for a moment.
Her face that had never frowned was always wearing a gentle smile.
“I believe in you. You’re a good person.”
“Did you see my inner self?”
“That’s right. No matter how empty it is, I’m a saint. I can know such things as much as I want.”
When I laughed at Adriana’s words, Adriana, who laughed along with me, stifled her laughter with a chuckle.
I wanted to correct that one thing she said about me being a good person.
I looked at Adriana again.
When she knew everything about what kind of person I was, thinking about how that smile would change, I felt a stinging pain in my chest for no reason.
Very rarely, I sometimes thought it would have been better if I hadn’t met Adriana at all.
If that smile turned into contempt, if the voice that had softly whispered to me turned cold.
I didn’t have much confidence to endure it then.
“If. Really if.”
“Yes?”
“If one day I suddenly disappear, even if I suddenly disappear without a word.”
The day I would face Theresa was not far away.
I didn’t think the possibility of me dying there was very high, but my death was definitely a predetermined future.
If that day came, I still only hoped that Adriana would smile softly at me.
Without regret, without lingering feelings.
I wanted her to forget me like that.
“I hope you won’t hate me too much.”
Adriana was puzzled by those words, but I didn’t say anything more.
I just blankly stared at the sky for a long time until the moon was hidden by the clouds again.
The flowing wind was telling me that time was approaching me.
It was telling me that the time for me to pluck the violet flower myself would soon come when the violet flowers wither.
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