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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Teottry
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The Doctor stared at me, her eyes widen, her mouth slightly agape, as if genuinely shocked.
Seeing the Doctor express this much emotion was a rare occurrence, even for me, someone who interacted with her relatively frequent. I’d only witnessed it a handful of times in my two years at the guild.
I cleared my throat a couple of times to bring her back to reality.
“D-Doctor?”
“Huh, huh? Oh, uh. Where were we? R-Right. Bunny said the S-rank Awakened pretended to be hypnotized because they liked him. Mmm-hmm. Right.”
Snapping out of her daze, the Doctor stammered, uncharacteristically flustered.
It was a rare glimpse of her human side, so I watched with keen interest, as if observing some exotic spectacle.
This seemed to be a direct result of my joke. Well, even I’d be speechless if I were in her shoes.
With one exception, the S-rank Awakened I’d used the fake hypnosis app on were all arrogant women who thought they were the best.
Of course, they were exceptional individuals in many ways. However, that didn’t give them the right to treat those less capable like slaves or trash.
Their personalities were utterly, irredeemably awful.
How awful? They not only found it offensive to be addressed by their first names by someone like me, demanding I use their full names, but they also insisted I address other women by their full names as well, claiming that being called by their first name by the likes of me was sexually humiliating. They also casually peppered their sentences with insults like, “That’s why you’re nothing but a pathetic, sex-crazed dog humping at women’s legs. You’re trash.”
That’s how awful they were.
These women, who treated me as less than human, a sex-crazed dog, liked me? It was nothing but a joke. A terrible one.
Even the Doctor was this shocked, so that said it all.
Still reeling from the surprise, the Doctor muttered in a voice barely above a whisper,
“Oh my, talk about a fluke. For Bunny to stumble upon the answer, even if it’s only half-right. I didn’t expect to be this surprised, to the point where I can’t even manage my expression…”
“Excuse me? What did you just say, Doctor?”
“Ah, no. Nothing, Bunny. I didn’t say anything. Don’t worry about it.”
She definitely said something, but I decided to let it go. Most of the Doctor’s mutterings were beyond my comprehension anyway.
“I see.”
I nodded and looked at the Doctor, her face still etched with surprise.
Was a single joke really that shocking? Or did she think I was serious?
If that were the case, her reaction made sense. These kinds of misunderstandings, if left unaddressed, could snowball into something unmanageable, returning to me like a karmic boomerang.
I had a gut feeling that something terrible would happen, so I decided to clear up any potential misunderstanding.
“Well, it was just a joke. It’ll be awkward if you take it seriously.”
“Huh, huh? A joke? R-Right, a joke. I knew that. Yeah. There’s no way Bunny would say something like that with a straight face.”
The Doctor was still flustered, but my words seemed to have reassured her, as she quickly regained her usual neutral expression.
Then, looking at me with unusual intensity hidden behind her languid eyes, she asked seriously,
“So, why do you think the S-rank Awakened pretended to be hypnotized? Tell me the truth this time.”
After the ridiculous “placebo effect” answer, she was now deflecting my question with another question. It was a little annoying that she was trying to avoid answering the question I had asked.
Didn’t she know not to answer a question with a question?
Frowning slightly to show my displeasure, I grumbled,
“I asked you first. Why do you keep avoiding the question?”
“Bunny still doesn’t understand. When you ask this kind of question, you’re supposed to state your own thoughts first. Your own answer, uninfluenced by others’ opinions.”
“What does that even…”
As I furrowed my brow further at her cryptic words, the Doctor, maintaining her neutral expression, offered a more understandable explanation.
“Bunny, I’m an extraordinary person. And the words of an extraordinary person carry weight. People’s thoughts and opinions are inevitably influenced by what I say. So, when you ask an open-ended question like the one you just asked, it’s logical to present your own pure, unbiased opinion first.”
The Doctor’s uncharacteristically thorough explanation made her intentions clear.
In short, she was saying, “If you hear my answer, it will stick in your head and inevitably influence you. So, it’s better to present your own uninfluenced answer first.”
“That makes sense. Thanks for the explanation.”
“Okay, so what does Bunny think?”
Having fully explained herself, the Doctor asked for my opinion again. Now, I could answer without complaint.
It wasn’t like she wouldn’t answer just because I answered first.
I thought for a moment. After hearing the ridiculous “placebo effect” explanation and making my equally ridiculous joke, a highly probable answer had flashed through my mind.
At least, it was the most likely answer I could come up with. It was so plausible that even the Doctor would probably say it was very close to the truth, or perhaps even the truth itself.
The more I thought about it, the more certain I became. Yes, this was it. It was a reason a normal person wouldn’t even imagine, but knowing those crazy women who were desperate to get rid of me, it was entirely plausible.
Having organized my thoughts, I turned to the Doctor with a confident smile.
“Doctor, I think there’s only one possible answer. You’ll be surprised when you hear it. The moment you hear this, you won’t need to give your own answer. Because this is the truth…!”
“Gulp…”
Perhaps nervous at my confidence, the Doctor swallowed hard. I was seeing a lot of her human side today.
“S-So, tell me what you think, Bunny.”
To the Doctor, whose breathing had grown ragged with anticipation, I, maintaining my confident smile, delivered the perfect answer.
“The reason those women pretended to be affected by that ridiculous fake hypnosis app is…”
“I-Is…”
“To set me up for a MeToo accusation!”
“W-What?”
“It’s not normal to wait for over six months just to bury someone like me, but knowing their level of crazy, it’s entirely possible. They’re definitely trying to destroy me socially with a MeToo accusation!”
Even with my talent for running away, I couldn’t escape if there was nowhere to run.
Those women, who hated me with a passion, probably realized how troublesome it would be to get rid of me physically. So, they decided to exploit their social standing as S-rank Awakened, of which there were only a few dozen in the world, to falsely accuse me of unspeakable acts and destroy me socially.
To ensure my complete and utter destruction, all the female S-rank Awakened in Liar’s Trap gathered and conspired to play along with the fake hypnosis app.
It might seem excessive, but those crazy women were capable of anything. I knew that better than anyone in the guild.
Upon hearing my perfect answer, the Doctor stared at me, her face even more dumbfounded than when she heard my absurd joke.
Pointing at her like a prosecutor revealing a crime, I pressed my accusation.
“And! If this perfect answer is correct, then you, Doctor, the one who gave me the fake hypnosis app, are an accomplice.”
“What?!”
Startled by the word “accomplice,” the Doctor flinched. She seemed afraid of having her crime exposed.
I could have pressed her further, forcing a confession and then expressing my betrayal and anger.
But the Doctor had done so much for me. So, I decided to give her a chance.
As she seemed to be racking her brain for a way to refute my perfect answer and clear her name, I threw her a lifeline, just as she had done for me.
“Doctor, I don’t think you betrayed me intentionally. You were threatened, weren’t you? By those women.”
If the Doctor said yes, it would confirm that those women had indeed pretended to be hypnotized to destroy me socially.
Until now, it had been a 99.9% certainty with a 0.1% margin of error. But if the Doctor confirmed it, it would become an absolute certainty.
My heart pounded as I awaited her response. The Doctor, her eyes darting nervously, finally spoke.
“Wh-What? Threatened…? Uh, y-yes, Bunny. I was threatened. They said they would destroy my lab, my life’s work, if I didn’t cooperate.”
The Doctor hesitated for a moment at the lifeline I offered, but her quick thinking quickly assessed the situation and grasped the opportunity to clear her name.
Her acceptance of the lifeline meant it was the undeniable truth.
Those crazy women… they actually did it. Damn, it was chilling.
But dealing with the current situation was more important than being chilled.
If she’d taken the lifeline, I had to pull her up.
I gave the Doctor, whose rotten eyes now held a glimmer of relief, a reassuring smile and launched into my awkward performance.
“As expected…! Those devils in human form. Threatening the powerless Doctor and forcing her to dirty her hands…!”
My acting was terribly got a stiff delivery, forced expression, unnatural tone… but it was just a formality, so it didn’t matter.
All that mattered was that the CCTV in the Doctor’s lab was recording this.
“Sigh, I understand, Doctor. I know you’re on my side.”
“Huh? Oh, uh. Yes, Bunny. I’m always on your side. Of course I am.”
The Doctor took my outstretched hand, and with that, I gained a powerful ally.
Compared to those crazy S-rank women who were actively trying to destroy me socially, she might be a bit lacking, but it was better than nothing.
“Ha, how can Bunny come up with such an idea? Truly remarkable. In many ways…”
Looking at the Doctor, who was muttering something inaudible with a grin, I said,
“Then, Doctor, I’ll go find allies to help me fight against those women who are trying to destroy me. Wish me luck.”
“Huh? Oh, uh, yeah, go ahead. Today’s Bunny was quite… interesting.”
Exhausted from the whirlwind of events, the Doctor weakly gestured for me to leave. I bowed to her and left the lab.
Stepping out of the guild headquarters, I walked through the night, pondering my next move.
Okay. Now that I knew they were trying to destroy me, I had to prepare my defense against their social assassination attempt.
And I sent a text message to the only female S-rank Awakened in Liar’s Trap who treated me like a human being.
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Another ally to face those baddie~ 😏
