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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Simzy
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Today was a day particularly packed with lectures.
Throughout those long lectures, I couldn’t focus at all.
The reason was…
It’s true. A friend gave me the sticky note.
Fuck you, what are you going to fuck? What, are you turned on?
My ass is super luscious, right? But too bad. You won’t find me lol.
Search the club all you want. I’m not there.
Backside_Of_One.
This person, also known as Butt, or Backsa.
Are you a virgin? Why are you so worked up? Find what?
Don’t bother wasting your time~
Actually, I don’t even go to Cheonggwang University.
Was this person provoking me to find them or begging me not to? This person was halfway to a split personality.
They even went so far as to send this picture:
(photo)
Actually, I’m a man.
‘What the fuck?!’
I almost threw my phone after seeing the picture. I naturally assumed it would be the usual butt pic, but it was a picture of a man’s dick.
= Fuck, don’t send me disgusting pictures.
A rare curse word slipped out of me.
It’s my dick. It’s huge, right? A size you can’t even compare to your tiny little cutie lol.
= Fuck off.
You looked lol
= You said you didn’t have one?
Actually, I do. It’s my dick. My balls are huge too.
= If you send another one, you’re dead. Keep provoking me. If you really want to get fucked like a dog.
My language was getting increasingly harsh. Even though I’m timid in real life, online, I’m a fearless warrior who doesn’t shy away from provocation.
But this person, either resigned or just pushing it, kept sending disgusting pictures.
(gay porn)
(gay porn)
= You fucking bastard. I’ll find you and fuck you until your pussy’s ripped. I’ll cum inside you. I’ll spank your ass so hard.
Lol Kang Cheol is cute. Your insults are so one-dimensional.
…Damn it. As they say, it takes one to know one, and my insults seemed to have little effect. I was a regular on online communities, but I was a lurker who rarely posted or commented.
Cum insiiiide? What am I supposed to do if I don’t have one? And I doubt your little cutie could rip anything no matter how much it tried.
Still, the fact that they kept insisting they were a man meant they were probably a little scared.
‘Do they think I’ll believe them now that they’re saying they’re a man?’
This is the same person who has sent hundreds of pictures of the same woman’s butt. And didn’t they just verify it with a picture of their butt and the sticky note? This person is 100% a woman.
Anyway, that’s that.
As a man, I can’t stand being told my dick is small.
= Little cutie my ass. My dick is bigger than the one in the picture you sent.
[Typing…]
Suddenly, there’s a buffer in their reply.
And then, the best they could come up with was…
…Really?
They were questioning the truth. What’s with this person?
= Would I lie about that? Don’t send me a tiny dick pic and try to compare.
Actually, the dick Backsa sent was quite large. Honestly, it’s longer than mine. But I was confident.
‘I win in girth.’
As everyone knows, girth is more important than length when it comes to dick size. The fact that condom sizes are distinguished by diameter rather than length is clear proof.
But this person…
Hey, is your dick really big?
How big is it?
I bet my fingers are bigger.
Send a picture if you’re so upset.
Why are they suddenly obsessed with this strange point?
No proof means what?
= So what?
I showed you proof. You should too.
= You said you were a man? What proof do you need?
Yeah, that’s why I sent the dick pic. That’s proof.
= Why would I send a dick pic to a man? lol
= You’re gay. Get lost. I’m not replying anymore.
I was going to ignore their messages now.
Why? Because I’m tired of it? No.
‘That was a good way to kill time.’
Thanks to them, the lecture time flew by.
“Alright, that’s all for today’s lecture. Good work, everyone.”
Since the lecture was over, there was no need to reply anymore. I could just go find them directly.
I quickly packed my things and said,
“Guys, let’s go to the club room.”
Sung-joo, who was packing his bag, asked,
“We’re going today?”
“Just to say hello. Noona Bam seemed to want us to come quickly.”
“Okay, let’s go. We need to eat that beef. Are we having the welcome party right away?”
“I’ll go too. I was curious anyway. I hope it’s a decent place.”
“Me too! I like Bam unni!”
The four of us headed straight to the club room.
When we arrived at the location Noona Bam told us, we saw a sign that read “Toons.”
The door was plastered with posters of famous anime and cartoon characters that seemed to be drawn by the club members. From the entrance, it had the distinct feel of an anime club.
Even at this moment, my mind was filled with thoughts of Backsa, the back alley girl.
‘What if I actually meet them?’
Of course, I couldn’t just blurt out, “I found you, give me that blowjob as promised.”
I didn’t want to risk getting arrested for trying to get laid with some girl from an alt account. What if they just denied it? How could I prove anything?
Lost in thought, I hesitated, and Sung-joo knocked on the door.
“Is anyone there?”
There was no response.
“Seems like no one’s here? Should we come back later?”
“That’s strange. Noona said she’d be at the club room.”
We had contacted Noona Bam beforehand.
Click
“Oh, it’s open.”
The door was unlocked. We stepped inside to find a surprisingly spacious room.
“Whoa, what? I thought it was on the verge of closing down? This club room is amazing!”
“I know, right? It’s way more serious than I expected.”
Sung-joo and Sung-hyun looked around the club room in admiration. A-reum and I followed them inside, and we understood why they were so impressed.
“…Is this really a club room? How many computers are there?”
They even looked much better than the PCs we used in class. A few were already turned on, so I checked the specs and found they were the latest models, released less than a year ago.
“Crazy. This is better than my computer at home.”
“Wo-wow! Kang Cheol, look over here!”
I turned to where A-reum was pointing and saw several packed bookshelves. She held out a comic book and said,
“Th-this is a first edition! It even has the author’s signature!”
“What? Let me see!”
It was real. A first edition with the author’s signature. I pulled out a few other books just in case, and most of them were first editions.
Then, Sung-hyun let out a surprised yell.
“Waaah! This was a limited edition sold at Comic World!”
“He-here too! This doujinshi was also famous at Comic World!”
Sung-hyun and A-reum kept exclaiming in awe. I looked too, and my eyes widened. I really wanted this one!
“I thought I’d never see this in my life…”
Until last year, I was a shut-in. I was a hardcore otaku, but I never participated in outside events. So the comic books that could only be obtained at Comic World were unattainable for me, and yet, here they were in the club room.
“Comic World? What’s that?”
Only Sung-joo, the fashion otaku, tilted his head in confusion.
Except for Sung-joo, the rest of us excitedly rummaged through the bookshelves. Not only were there manga and doujinshi, but also novels, scrolls, and various goods.
“This is the club that’s on the verge of closing down? Why?”
I couldn’t understand. Even if anime clubs were niche, this place should have been attracting all the otakus in the university.
There was something else strange.
Sung-hyun was snooping around somewhere else. A place somewhat removed from the bookshelves, the otaku’s paradise.
Clang
A metallic sound rang out.
Sung-hyun admired the exercise equipment.
“Crazy. This is the latest model. I want it.”
“Wait, why is there a power rack in an anime club room?”
There was even a bench and weight plates of various sizes. What kind of place was this? There was no way the school would provide this kind of support to a small anime club.
Just as Sung-hyun was excitedly doing pull-ups…
“Oh, you’re here! Welcome to Toons!”
Noona Bam appeared.
Wearing a cardigan over a one-piece dress, Noona Bam hopped around, welcoming us. Every time I saw her, I thought she had the air of a noble lady.
‘Surely Backsa isn’t Noona Bam, right?’
The thought briefly crossed my mind, but I quickly dismissed it. That noona sending me lewd pictures? No way.
Her image was far from Backsa’s, and crucially, there was a huge difference in breast size. Noona Bam had a noticeable bust even in loose clothing.
Backsa, on the other hand, was flat-chested. Maybe an A-cup at best. Perhaps even AA.
“Here, everyone sign here!”
Noona Bam handed us application forms.
Without hesitation, we started writing our names.
Then, she added,
“Oh, right. Our club has a rule.”
“A rule?”
“No dating! Absolutely!”
“…Huh?”
What kind of outdated rule was that?
I looked at her quizzically, and Noona Bam said with a gloomy expression,
“I joined the club last year. Back then, there were a lot of members, but now there aren’t. It’s all because of dating. The club went to hell.”
“Ah…”
I didn’t know the details, but I could guess.
Noona Bam said with a determined look,
“That can’t happen this year. So, no dating! Of course, it only applies within the club.”
I involuntarily glanced to the side. My eyes met A-reum’s. She gave a strange smile and let out a little giggle.
“Hmm. Here you go, unni.”
A-reum handed in her application first.
“Ahem.”
I cleared my throat and wrote my name on the application. We weren’t dating or anything. We were just closer than normal friends.
After everyone finished filling out the applications…
“Welcome everyone! I’m Yoo Bam, the president of Toons. Nice to meet you!”
“Huh? Oh, nice to meet you. Wait, you’re the president?”
An exchange student as the club president? That was unusual.
Noona Bam replied to my question with a wistful expression,
“I wasn’t originally. But everyone left. So I’m the president.”
“I-I see.”
It was related to the club’s implosion.
Soon, Noona Bam brightened up and said,
“How is everyone today? Let’s have a welcome party! The other members will be here soon!”
“I’m good! Are you buying us beef?”
“Of course. I’ll buy you anything you want. Ahem.”
Noona Bam put her hands on her hips and puffed out her chest. I barely managed to restrain my gaze.
“Oh, wait a moment. I got a message. Hmm.”
After checking her phone, Noona Bam said,
“Shall we go? We can go to the restaurant first.”
We headed to the restaurant.
‘Beef, beef!’
My mind was filled with thoughts of beef. Finally, something other than chicken breast. You’re dead, beef.
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Thanks for the chapter 👍🏼