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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Zaped
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The car sped down the highway. Above, clouds drifted across the sky. Below, a desolate wasteland and a road stretched out. Inside the car, only silence accompanied us.
It felt like I was back at my regular barbershop.
The barber in my neighborhood was a man of few words, only uttering, “How would you like it cut?” and “All done.” He wasn’t the best or the cheapest, but his silence was enough to make me a regular customer.
But this level of silence was almost deafening.
All creatures needed to relieve tension. Camilla tapped her foot nervously, the imposing woman took small sips of her drink, and the driver picked his nose discreetly.
Finally, the woman broke the silence.
“Handsome man, are you used to this kind of situation?”
The imposing woman glanced at me. Camilla answered for me.
“Working on it.”
“I asked the handsome man.”
The driver replied.
“Right, four o’clock.”
The woman, instead of scolding him, raised her rifle. However, she didn’t take the safety off or load it. About 400 meters away at four o’clock, a motorcycle was following us.
Camilla narrowed her eyes, watching the motorcycle. Fortunately, it began to fall behind.
“What was that about?”
I asked after everyone had lowered their weapons.
“It means if they get too close, we shoot.”
It seemed to be an unspoken rule on the road.
As we approached a junction, a car ahead of us flashed its mirror. The driver slowed down, and then sped up once the car was a small dot in the distance.
For some reason, I felt a bit uneasy. Camilla seemed to feel the same, as she cleared her throat and shifted slightly. But that was all.
After that, the conversation was limited to necessary information. We didn’t ask unnecessary questions, and they didn’t probe us either. We only shared the information needed to safely reach our destination in this old car.
Compared to Camilla, I was much better at keeping things concise. Of course, it was hard to talk normally while stuffing your chest with so much cloth.
The landscape gradually changed. There were more abandoned and burnt-out cars. We passed by dilapidated containers, tattered tent cities, and sandbags stained with dried blood.
A signpost read, “Hampton, 10km.”
Beyond that, a chilling warning was spray-painted on a perfectly good sign: “Shoot on sight if you don’t stop.” “Hampton is hell, turn back.” “Repent before the goddess of hunger.”
Soon, we reached a checkpoint. There were over twenty lanes. Soldiers armed with rifles were stationed everywhere. Our driver entered the shortest line. A flag with the inscription “14th National Guard” fluttered in the wind.
The barrier rose, and the car moved slowly forward. We stopped at a “Stop” sign and got out as instructed. We left our guns in the car and walked slowly with our hands up.
“Driver, open the car door, trunk, and hood. The rest of you stand in front of the thermal camera. Proceed.”
The soldiers didn’t search us. This was just the first checkpoint. They only checked if we were zombies or not. After passing this, we would go to the second checkpoint for a more detailed identity check.
Camilla and the brokers had already prepared for everything. So, as long as we got past this, there shouldn’t be any problems. The driver passed. The imposing woman passed. Then it was Camilla’s turn.
“Hold on.”
Professionally, Camilla didn’t show any emotion. She simply stepped back slowly. The soldiers at the monitor grinned.
“Hey, frog.”
“Me?”
Camilla’s voice was like that of a boy going through puberty, a strange mix of high and low pitches.
“You’ve got bigger boobs than most women. Do you work out a lot? And why are you sweating so much? You’re like a piece of poached pork.”
Apparently, they thought Camilla was a fat, sweaty man.
It was my turn.
“Hold on.”
The imposing woman grumbled.
“What’s up?”
“His temperature is high.”
“He’s horny?”
“Are you?”
“I’m on duty.”
While they were arguing, a sergeant with a mustache approached. He was carrying a pistol.
“What’s going on?”
“This guy’s temperature is high. I was checking if he’s been bitten.”
The sergeant looked at the monitor and then at me.
“Over there. Step back and stand in front of the camera again.”
I did as I was told. The sergeant stroked his mustache.
“37.7 degrees? That’s a bit odd.”
I looked behind me. The cars were starting to back up. Everyone looked annoyed.
I could just shoot all these soldiers and drive away. Or maybe I could shoot the grenade on the soldier’s waist…
While I was making plans, he asked,
“Hey, what’s your name?”
I gave him the alias I had prepared.
“Caesar.”
“Everyone, get back in the car.”
We got back in the car, but only one side of the barrier opened.
“What’s up? Why isn’t it opening?”
“Turn on your hazard lights and move to the quarantine area on the left. All of you. If you do anything stupid, you’ll die there. And you, fatty, put down that knife. I’ll inform the inside, so don’t even think about it. Next, move!”
The soldiers aimed their rifles at us. I picked up my rifle.
“Damn it, these guys again.”
To my disappointment, the driver started the car. The woman finished her wine and let out a long sigh.
“You guys are new at this, aren’t you?”
“Why?”
“Normally, you’d start freaking out. Then me and my loving husband would shoot you. You’d be reported as zombies, and we’d get a reward. But you’re surprisingly calm.”
“Yeah? Are you going to shoot us now?”
“Why would I? If you’re really infected, and your blood splatters on me, I’ll become a zombie too. And I won’t get my reward.”
“So you’re saying you won’t get paid if we die?”
Camilla asked from the back. The woman shrugged.
“There’s not much to it. Just get naked, get your blood drawn, and stay here for a day. You’ll be fine.”
“I’ll go first.”
Camilla stood up and started to take off her clothes. The men stared at her.
But if she took off her clothes now, her incredible body would be revealed. And the brokers would realize that she was a woman.
And that would put me in danger.
There was no other way. I had to use my charm. I pushed Camilla back slightly and stepped forward. I slowly unbuttoned my shirt and flexed my muscles.
“Excuse me, do you remember me? I think I met you at a party with Cassandra.”
The woman in the hazmat suit looked at me.
“I don’t think so. Who are you?”
“I’m not sure if you remember. But I had a really great date with Cassandra.”
Camilla’s eyes widened slightly. The brokers were watching us, trying to understand the situation.
“Cassandra? You mean that self-centered woman? I know her. But I don’t think I know you.”
“It was a while ago. I think we just had one really hot date.”
I winked and started to unbutton my pants.
“Hey, wait a minute! I need to make a call!”
The woman seemed quite embarrassed.
“Well, I’ll see you around. Or maybe I won’t.”
I was about to show them my
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wats wrong with mc
Confused