Fated to Die in an Academy Novel – Chapter 128

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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: JayM
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Regret was always a miserable emotion.

Could I have done better? Was there another way?

It was pointless to hypothesize, and it was better to focus on the future than to dwell on lost possibilities.

My logic always told me that, but my emotions wouldn’t cooperate.

No, I had always tried to act like I was fine, but this time, it was different.

For the first time in my failure-filled life, the one thing I wished for in my loss-filled life had completely crumbled, making it difficult for me to control my emotions like usual.

I didn’t intend to hurt her, but perhaps because I did, I kept thinking about other possibilities, other futures.

The worst part was that if I asked anyone about it, they would probably say “She’s just a friend giving up on her dream,” or “It’s not your fault.”

That wasn’t what I wanted to hear.

My gloomy mood brought on negative thoughts.

She didn’t reply to my texts or calls.

I mechanically went through my daily routine, but I kept checking for her novel, wondering if she might have uploaded a new chapter.

The last chapter.

How many times did I reread that familiar scene that ended with Lilac’s scream?

Was I the only one waiting for the next chapter of the novel that still only had 3 views?

Probably. It was still a really boring novel.

It was a precious story to me, but to others, it was just another generic, failed novel.

I lived in a daze.

Humans were creatures of adaptation, and I got used to not being able to contact her, to her not uploading any more chapters.

…I got tired of novels with overly violent protagonists, got into arguments in the comment sections and blocked, felt self-conscious about taking my anger out on others, and lived like that…

…when I ran into you on the street by sheer coincidence.

I ran like a madman to catch you as you tried to escape.

I shouldn’t have.

“…Hey, how have you been?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m doing fine.”

The cheap pojangmacha might seem like an inappropriate place for this kind of conversation, but it was perfect for us.

The drunk customers around us weren’t interested in our conversation, and the loud music somehow made it easier to talk about heavy topics.

And with the liquid courage potion, also known as soju, I was fully prepared.

“You’re not writing anymore?”

But the liquid courage potion, soju, had a side effect of confusion.

So, she sprayed soju all over my face.

“…Sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry.”

“…No, I’m sorry for avoiding you, and for crying because I felt so insecure, and for bragging with your money.”

She was smiling as she said that.

It was incredibly unpleasant and unsettling.

I wished she would get angry like before while stubbornly insisting that she could still do it and yelling that she would write a better story.

Her lukewarm smile that was neither cheerful nor angry looked like she had given up on everything, and I wanted to yell at her to stop making that face.

“I think that was what bothered me the most, more than the betrayal. I didn’t want to be pitied by you, of all people.”

“It wasn’t pity.”

“Yeah, I know now. Knowing your personality, it was probably encouragement.”

No, it wasn’t just encouragement.

“But… but you shouldn’t have. So I’m quitting. No, I already discontinued it, so there’s nothing to quit anymore. It’s already over.”

Over… You’re saying that your dream, and my dream of seeing it come true, are both over.

This was… regret.

Something even more sticky and unpleasant than regret, something that came after.

“Can’t you try again?”

The words I couldn’t say that day.

“…What?”

“Again. It doesn’t have to be this novel. Of course, I want you to continue ‘The Holy Sword Hero of the Academy,’ but if you really can’t, can’t you try another story?”

“What are you talking about all of a sudden? You want me to write another shitty novel?”

…Even that would be fine in the worst case, but even I knew that wasn’t the answer here.

“I’ll help you. I’ll keep supporting you until you succeed. And I still have the money I saved. I’ll keep supporting you, so you can focus only on writing. So you don’t have to worry about what others say. So… let’s go together.”

I should have said this sooner.

I shouldn’t have given up, shouldn’t have let go, shouldn’t have set limits and made excuses about it being for her happiness.

I should have confronted it, even if it meant getting hurt, instead of being cowardly and running away.

Her face flushed slightly, and she looked surprised for a moment, but it was fleeting.

She smiled.

It was a smile I hated.

“I’m sorry.”

It would have been better if I had said it on the day her parents took her away, so I wouldn’t have these foolish regrets.

“I don’t even know what I want to write anymore, or how to write, so how can I still write now?”

Don’t smile like that.

“And is that something you say to a friend? It sounded like a confession.”

It was over.

-…Go…

My head hurt.

“Anyway, let’s drink more. It’s been a while, and who knows when we’ll see each other again.”

We foolishly kept drinking, and we left the pojangmacha completely wasted.

Come to think of it, it was a life of loss.

And a life of regret.

I thought I wasn’t that stupid, but maybe I was just trying to act cool.

I should have cried and begged my mother not to abandon me when her hands were trembling.

I should have asked the police to find my parents.

I shouldn’t have insisted I wasn’t an orphan when I first arrived at the orphanage.

I should have honestly told you I would read your story when we first met.

I should have clung to Ms. Cathy and told her that I didn’t want to say goodbye before she died.

I should have told the director I wanted to go to high school when he asked me.

When I became an adult and started having more freedom, I should have found something I wanted to do instead of relying on you.

Then I wouldn’t have projected my own resignation onto you and forced you to carry that burden.

And it was the same now.

I should have supported you, even if it meant forcing myself, when you were drunk and staggering, apologizing, and trying to distance yourself.

Screech!!!!

An unpleasant, ear-piercing noise.

A truck veering off course.

A blaring horn.

Flashing emergency lights and someone’s scream.

And you, drunk and stumbling.

I couldn’t believe that death was coming for you now, as if mocking me.

Hey, this wasn’t right.

“Damn it.”

This wasn’t right.

“God damn it…!”

I ran.

I ran instinctively.

I knew I couldn’t save you, that there were no miracles, that I was an empty person who had never held onto anything…

-Ju… st… go…

Too far.

I couldn’t take the hit for you.

I couldn’t reach you.

A scream, a mix of a strangled cry and a beast’s howl, erupted from my throat.

The thought of losing you again made me wonder if I had sinned against God in my past life.

I, an atheist, instantly became a believer.

If there was no God, then I would have to admit that all this damn bad luck was just… bad luck.

-Ju… st… go… It’s… okay…

It was too frustrating to think that everything that happened to me was just a coincidence and not someone else’s will.

I did enough. I didn’t resent anyone. I didn’t beg for anything back.

I just wished they wouldn’t take away the last thing I had left. Was that too much to ask?

Seconds before your death…

…I cursed the world for the first time.

I knew, from my countless unanswered prayers, that begging wouldn’t work.

So, I cursed.

And as I cursed with all my heart—

-The Lord of All Worlds offers you a deal.-

The world froze, and for the first time, something resembling God appeared before me.

-It offers you a chance to save the author.-

The frozen world. You, about to be hit by a truck.

I didn’t even have a choice.

-The world you created is still frozen. Affirm if you are prepared to see its end.-

“The world we created?”

-That is… No, it’s too troublesome to explain. Nice to meet you, it’s been a while, right?-

…I didn’t know any transcendental beings.

-You don’t recognize me? I was the only other reader of that novel…-

…Oh my god, I actually had a clue now.

The last chapter of the novel had 3 views. One was her, one was me, and it seemed the last one was God.

-Enter the world of “The Holy Sword Hero of the Academy” and see it through to the end. Then I’ll save her for now. Ah, but I’m not saving her just because you finish it somehow. You have to show me a story I find satisfactory.-

“I’ll do it.”

-Oh, you’re enthusiastic. Can you do it? I’m happy to see the stopped story continue, but you know what kind of world that novel is, right?-

“I said I’ll do it. Why is the Lord of All Worlds so long-winded?”

-I like it, the way you’re already thinking about what kind of character I would like and starting to act. A world like that suits someone broken like you much better than this boring world.-

Acting. Maybe. But I was truly prepared to do anything to save her.

-I hope you like the new world. It’s a world prepared for you. Please do your best. Ha-neul, no, I should call you ‘Kang So-hyun’ from now on, right?-

My vision shifted.

You, who was about to die, was looking at me from afar with a despairing expression.

And the unpleasant noise that grated on my ears came closer.

“No…!!!”

Wow, shit. A truck. I was actually experiencing this in my life.

But it seemed God wasn’t as bad as I thought.

He showed me a miracle in the end.

Thud.

Screech.

Thump.

Splatter.

My body, twisted at an odd angle, collided with various things, and my consciousness faded.

It was a bit disappointing that the last thing I saw was your crying face.

I wanted to see you smile again.

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What the hell.

“Aub.”

-Congratulations! You have successfully transmigrated into the stopped novel world! If you don’t want to see your barely alive physical body die, bring the story to a conclusion, one way or another.

Reward: Your survival, the author’s salvation.

Failure penalty: You die.-

Well, okay.

It was all good.

But why…

“Auub…!!!”

…did I transmigrate as a baby? What was I supposed to do like this?

-The character you possessed is Kang So-hyun. I transmigrated you to a past point in time because it would be too difficult if you started from the prologue, so be grateful, human!-

…A character who dies.

Thank you so much, you bastard.

…Ah, I remembered.

The last argument I had with this bastard.

LordofAllWorlds: No, but seriously, this protagonist is so annoying.

ㄴTallDarkStranger: Then you write it.

ㄴLordofAllWorlds: Even you would write a more interesting story than this.

ㄴTallDarkStranger: Why are you being such a jerk to an author who’s trying their best?

ㄴLordofAllWorlds: Lol. So it’s okay to write shit as long as you’re trying your best?

ㄴTallDarkStranger: You’ll end up transmigrating into the novel, you bastard~ Stop it.

ㄴLordofAllWorlds: Yeah right. And even if that happens, it’ll be you, right? What a biased shield.

You were right. It wasn’t you, but me.

Damn it, I wouldn’t have said that if I knew you were God, you crazy bastard.

So…

-No. Stop watching.-

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And I was jolted awake by a heart-wrenching pain.

I was grateful that it pulled me out of the memories that were consuming me, but I wasn’t happy.

“Hey, wait. I need to see more.”

The memories after she stopped writing the novel were clearly missing.

I could find out what I forgot if I just saw a little more.

But the hand gripping my heart wouldn’t let me, squeezing tightly as if refusing my plea.

No, it probably didn’t intend to show me this memory in the first place.

It just couldn’t block the part of the memory that crossed over the noise barrier due to the Succubus Queen’s Authority.

But I had to see more.

Thanks to this memory, I was finally starting to understand what the memories beyond the noise were.

“…!?”

But my heart hurt so much.

“…Fine, so that’s how you’re going to play it.”

Then I had an idea too.

“Hey, then at least help me get out of here. You can do that, right?”

The hand, thinking I had given up, readily started breaking the world, and since it had already absorbed most of the Succubus Queen’s Authority, I could escape quite smoothly.

The Authority that was surrounding me like a black egg shattered, and the first thing I saw was Lilac wielding the Holy Sword and was about to become a Mother-in-Law Slayer.

Not yet…

I wasn’t going to let Lilac become a Mother-in-Law Slayer, and my sleep therapist couldn’t die yet.

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T/N – Oh damn. We now have a clear picture of the MC’s past. There are still some unanswered mysteries, but we now have context. Quite nice, especially when we’re only about 120+ chapters in. My theory in a previous chapter loses some points since the Creator doesn’t seem to be as hostile to the MC as I thought, but it’s still possible as it might have been set up as a trial of sorts for the MC. There’s also the fact that the dream powered Authority showed the MC more than what the Creator intended, which makes me doubt whether this Creator is the MC’s author friend, this Lord of All Worlds, or someone else entirely.

Also, damn. Did the author really have to make their love story so kdrama-like and frustrating? My heart fucking hurts after reading all that.

If you find any mistakes, feel free to point them out in the comments.