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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Cyno
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The second day of duty passed without any special incidents. Tanya, who had swaggered into the dungeon, came back out complaining about how tough it was after hunting just a few slimes and goblins. Meanwhile, the hunters, having heard rumors of the bald man’s arrest, obediently submitted to inspections, lying flat on the ground.
Strangely enough, a fair number of female hunters—extras who never appeared in the original eroge—showed up. Though their looks were noticeably inferior to Iruna or Tanya, they were still passable, making the inspections enjoyable.
I didn’t sleep with any of them. Seriously, ladies, wash up a bit before coming around… I might’ve considered it if they were prettier, but they just weren’t worth the effort. My standards have gotten too high after being surrounded by beauties these past few days.
But what was weird was that all five female hunters I inspected today smelled the same. Was it some clever tactic to avoid getting assaulted during inspections? I let them through after a quick check, and they praised me, saying, “As expected of such a fair and just officer!” before heading into the dungeon.
Just how much of a scumbag are the guards in this world? If my reputation keeps rising, more female hunters will visit my dungeon, and surely, some of them will be real lookers. Just like how Tanya sought me out after hearing about me.
While inspecting hunters until evening, I finally got a chance to realize the value of Return Scrolls. I proudly checked the spoils Geum Taeyang had laid out.
“Four slime fluids, five dryad branches, and one dryad leaf. You didn’t hunt any goblins?”
“Goblin weapons aren’t worth much, and they’re too heavy to carry around, so we usually leave them behind.”
“I see. Slime fluids are a key ingredient in cosmetics, and dryad byproducts are like basic alchemy materials. But I don’t see any drop items like Return Scrolls?”
From what I knew, Return Scrolls could be obtained from treasure chests in lower-tier dungeons. Even dryads, which appear on the fifth floor, drop them.
And various weapons, rings, armor, and other equipment drop occasionally too. That’s why the eroge forum always warned against buying gear from shops—why waste money when you can get everything from dungeons?
But today, all the hunters brought back were monster byproducts. Not a single one had a finished item. I even searched them thoroughly, thinking they might’ve hidden something, but nothing turned up.
Geum Taeyang had been impressed when discussing the value of slime and dryad materials, but his expression turned puzzled when I mentioned Return Scrolls.
“Huh? Return Scrolls?”
“You can get them in dungeons, right?”
“Wait, have you never actually been inside a dungeon, Officer?”
As if. I’ve cleared hundreds of dungeons in the game. But it was true that I hadn’t stepped foot in one since coming to this world.
The original owner of this body might’ve gone in, but that had nothing to do with me. No memories, no responsibility. Hey, Creator, if you’re listening, how about filling me in? Did I really have to be this clueless about this world’s common sense?
“Yeah.”
“That’s amazing. Most guards level up by clearing dungeons to gain the necessary strength, but you reached this position through pure training? That’s truly admirable.”
Ah, so that’s the secret. Good to know.
“It’s nothing special.”
“I always wondered how someone so outstanding could exist, but now it makes sense.”
“Enough flattery. Just answer the question.”
Normally, I’d let it slide, but this was too blatant. If I let him keep going, he’d probably start licking my boots.
Though if Iruna did that, it’d be kinda hot… Maybe I should try training Pella to do it. A man’s dream is to have his ass worshipped, after all.
“Ah, well, there are rumors about getting items in dungeons. But they’re just rumors. I’ve been here for half a year and never once seen a Return Scroll. The only ‘finished’ items are the crude daggers goblins carry. Think about it—how would slaying a monster made of cloth drop a magic scroll or metal equipment? Doesn’t make sense, right?”
Weirdly realistic for a game world. Hard to argue with that logic.
“I see.”
“Glad I could help.”
“Alright, get going. Good work today.”
“Thank you!”
Geum Taeyang bowed politely and left. The more I see him, the more I like the guy. Too bad his name isn’t “Geum Taeyang-nyeo” (金太陽孃) instead—would’ve been perfect if he were a girl.
Once he was gone, I checked my inventory box.
[Low-Grade Potion x99]
[Return Scroll x99]
Even after using a few, the numbers hadn’t changed at all. If I sold these, how much would I make?
Hehehe. I’m rich! Money literally duplicates itself! I grabbed one potion and one Return Scroll to test the market, but then someone opened the door and walked in.
“Captain? What brings you here?”
“You think I only come when there’s business?”
“Well, no, but…”
Serika, who had been wearing a stern expression, suddenly burst into laughter. She clutched her stomach, unable to stop giggling.
“Hahaha. So this is why you teased me earlier. It is pretty funny.”
“Did you come for revenge over this morning? How cute of you, Serika-nim.”
“Pfft. Got anything more original?”
I tried countering, but she didn’t even flinch. She’d already built up immunity in less than a day. Damn it. Total defeat.
“Don’t sulk. Like I said, I do have business today.”
“What is it?”
“Are you pouting?”
Me? Pout? Please. I’m not that petty. My heart is as vast as the Pacific Ocean.
Serika, who had been so confident earlier, suddenly looked flustered, gauging my reaction. That expression was hilarious. Fine, I’ll play along.
“Not at all.”
“Cheer up. I’ve got good news for you.”
“Oh? Now I’m curious. What is it?”
“There’s an execution ceremony for the guys you arrested yesterday. Wanna go watch?”
An execution the day after arrest? The civil servants in this world work fast. Some real-world bureaucrats should take notes.
“Sure. But do we have to go right now?”
“We’ve got some time. Why?”
“I wanted to buy some seeds for the flowerbed on the way. It looks a bit empty after seeing it with you earlier, so I thought I’d fill it up.”
“Great idea. Gardening is fun. I don’t have a flowerbed at my place, so I never got to do it. If you’re okay with it, I can recommend some beginner-friendly plants.”
“I’d appreciate that.”
Following Serika, a question suddenly popped into my head.
“Captain, don’t you earn more than me? You don’t even have a flowerbed at home?”
“I live in the barracks. No matter how strong a guard is, you never know what might happen, so living outside feels risky.”
“That is dangerous. Especially for someone as beautiful as you, Captain.”
“Eek!”
I’d thrown in the compliment casually, but her reaction was priceless. She’d built up resistance to being called cute, but “beautiful” still got to her.
“Honestly, when I first saw you, I almost fell for you. You were the most beautiful woman I’d ever met.”
“Stop…”
“Your skin is amazing too. You must take really good care of it.”
“N-No, I just do basic skincare.”
“Wait, are you not wearing makeup right now? I thought you were because you’re so pretty. So this is your natural face? There’s probably no one in this city more beautiful than you, Captain.”
“Enough! Stop it!”
Serika fanned herself furiously, her face burning red.
“Now I see you’ve got quite the silver tongue. How many women have you made cry with that skill?”
“None. I never met anyone before becoming a guard.”
“Really? Then how are you so smooth?”
“Because I mean every word.”
“Sigh…”
Serika flapped the front of her uniform, as if suddenly feeling hot. The four-leaf clover pinned to her chest pocket stood out prominently.
I was about to tease her more, but we arrived at a stall near the plaza. Serika struck up a conversation with the vendor, acting like she’d been saved.
“We’re here to buy seeds for a flowerbed.”
“Oh, Captain Serika! It’s an honor to have you at my stall.”
“Hehe.”
Serika turned to me with a triumphant smile. Was she showing off how famous and impressive she was? Cute.
“Give us some sungrass, mana grass, and mint.”
Serika had good taste. Sungrass and mana grass were ingredients for low-grade potions, and mint was the plant that triggered events with the innkeeper’s daughter in the game.
All three could be grown even at Gardening Level 1. Guess her desire to decorate the flowerbed wasn’t just lip service.
“Are the two of you growing them together? Are you lovers?”
“N-No!”
Serika jumped in surprise. I quickly sidled up next to her.
“Do we look that good together?”
“Haha. A perfect match. You’re the most compatible couple I’ve ever seen.”
“Thanks.”
“You…”
I ignored her glare. Shouldn’t have teased me if you didn’t want payback. Consider this your punishment.
“Here are your seeds. I added a little extra, wishing you both a bright future.”
“How much?”
“Just 10 copper coins.”
That was cheap. In the game, this much would’ve cost 50 copper. Guess real-world prices were lower after the realism patch.
I reached for my pouch, but Serika stopped me.
“Here’s 10 copper.”
“Thank you! Please come again!”
We left the stall.
“I could’ve paid.”
“Consider it a gift. You gave me one too, remember?”
Serika tapped the four-leaf clover on her chest.
“But this was nothing compared to what you just gave me. Next time, I’ll treat you to a meal.”
“Hmm. I didn’t do it expecting anything in return, but if my subordinate’s offering, I’ll gladly accept. Wait, more importantly—what was that earlier?”
“What do you mean?”
“That… about us being… a couple…”
Too embarrassed to finish, Serika trailed off. Adorable.
“We got a discount thanks to that.”
“So you just went along with it? Do you flirt with every woman like this?”
“Of course not. It’s only because it’s you, Captain.”
“……”
Haha. Another win for me. Serika’s face—no, even her ears—turned bright red as she fell silent.
The stall and execution grounds were in the same plaza, so we arrived quickly. The executioner was just raising his blade, about to begin.
Then came the bald man’s desperate pleas.
“I was wrong! I admit it! Please spare me! I want to live! Live!”
The bald man’s head flew off. The watching citizens cheered. Typical medieval savages, celebrating a death.
“Criminals deserve to die.”
Even Serika, who had been silent, spoke with pride. Hmm… I have many thoughts, but I’ll keep them to myself.
As the execution wrapped up, something glinted on the ground. Pushing past the hyenas scrambling for the corpse’s nails and hair, I got a clear look.
[Mandrake Seed x1]
Wasn’t this a dungeon-restricted item? While Serika was lost in the crowd, I pocketed the seed.
Jackpot. With this, I can finally bed Tanya.
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