Absolutely Do Not Touch Eldmia Egga – Chapter 17

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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Yuziro
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14 years.

Looking back at my life, I never really enjoyed a proper break.

It was like that even before I was 8, not to mention after that. It just changed from spending time with dreams and expectations to spending time with anger and venom.

Positively speaking, I had spent it densely and fruitfully, but negatively speaking, I had overworked myself to the point of child abuse.

I had pushed myself to the extent that I suspected I might have developed a kind of obsession, so I decided to just take a good rest this time.

“Let’s go sightseeing!”

After finishing a simple errand at the adventurers’ guild, I unilaterally declared to Lagnis.

“Why did you go to the adventurers’ guild?”

“Nothing much. I just asked if there were any adventurers they hadn’t seen until recently.”

Since if they were aiming for kidnapping, they were limited in the people they could use. Even if there were surveillants, it would be mercenaries or adventurers.

Thieves would risk even entering the village, and if caught in the middle, they could blow their backs without a chance to handle it. Those who had to be hired for a high price would leave traces and make it harder to clean up later.

It’s a world where those with high skills can cut off their employer’s head if they’re abandoned. They won’t be able to use such high quality people recklessly.

The more pawns they have, the more they want a pawn that can be easily cut off.

Offering affection and snacks as bribes to the sister receptionist and checking the information every day was the first step in what I would do from now on.

The information I heard today was “There were no particularly new faces.” Since I had expected that much, I decided to enjoy sightseeing without regret.

The Ogwen sightseeing began, and it was a more pleasant experience than I had imagined.

Even if it was a place I didn’t usually go or didn’t need to go, I first moved my feet and checked it out if there were a lot of people.

There were many pricey things, from food to equipment, but generally not experiencing shops catering to adventurers, and just looking around was quite an enjoyable experience for both of us.

“Have you been to places like this a lot?”

“No. Not at all.”

When I led the way too fearlessly, Lagnis, who had been enjoying this walk careleslly, asked.

“Huh? You don’t know where you’re going?”

“To be precise, I only knew these shops existed. What reason would I have to come here?”

Essential tools or information that could be considered adventurer tips were taught by Asirye anyway, and I had no reason to purchase equipment, including armor, since I was still growing.

All the other miscellaneous things were meaningless now, even if I would buy them later. In fact, if it weren’t for this opportunity, I wouldn’t have come here on purpose before I turned 16.

But even if we wandered around like lovers, there wouldn’t be any dating spots or tourist attractions in a city that was just starting to grow into a fortress city, right?

If they had been there from the beginning, it would be different, but there was no such thing in Ogwen, and now that it was a frontier, there was no room to create such things in a border city.

Well, I don’t know what it will be like later when the adventurers’ guild grows and the wanderer population increases, but it wasn’t like that yet.

In the end, there was nothing else to do but enjoy window shopping for new things.

Still, we could buy and eat hard-to-eat chocolates, or overly sweet snacks at stores that specialized in adventurers.

So this area, which was unexpectedly close to an adventurer district, was actually perfect for a dating experience.

“By the way, I didn’t know they sold these things to adventurers. Do adventurers really make a lot of money?”

“What, chocolate?”

Lagnis nodded, looking at a snack store right in front of us with a huge signboard advertising chocolate.

“Yeah. Extremely sweet snacks too.”

“Because sweet foods help when you use your brain a lot. They have a lot of sugar, so they don’t rot easily, and in the case of chocolate, it’s also high in calories, so it’s not bad as an emergency food.

Rather than making a lot of money, wouldn’t it be something close to first-aid supplies for them?”

Potions do exist in this world, but they’re still expensive. From low quality to high quality, they’re all just expensive

. There are various types, from the insane effects that instantly regenerate wounds much like a troll does, to the effects of a nutritional supplement taken before bed, but they’re expensive.

After all is said and done, adventurers who haven’t reached a certain level have to rely on food, medicinal herbs, folk remedies, and medical knowledge, just like in my previous life.

Asirye also very enthusiastically educated me about medicinal herbs and poisonous herbs that could be found in the forest. She really taught me all about elven folk remedies to folk remedies commonly used by adventurers.

Some of them were close to superstitions, so I had to filter out the adventurers’ folk remedies.

“It’s quite systematic. But chocolate is expensive, right? They use that as first-aid supplies?”

“You got it. Miss! Just give me two chocolates!”

“Miss? Hoho. Just give me 9 copper coins, dear.”

“As expected, a pretty miss with a kind heart. Thank you!”

A woman in her 40s gave us the chocolate. I received two chocolates that seemed to be only half the size of a piece of nutritional
jelly. I handed one to Lagnis, and chewed on the other. Hmm. It seems to be roughly between 85% and 99% cacao.

“Huh? Copper coins? 9?”

“Originally, it’s 10. You know the taste, so try it, young lady.”

I know what she’s worried about. The chocolate she originally knew must have been something that required silver or gold coins to eat.

However, even if she realizes that the quality is different from the chocolate she knew, it would be hard to accept that this tiny thing costs 5 copper coins. From a commoner’s perspective, It’s enough money for two meals a day, accommodation, and even a bathhouse.

However, unless they’re complete novice adventurers, this price isn’t that expensive for adventurers whose activity level is intense enough to need these things. That’s why they can afford to do business targeting adventurers.

After thinking for a moment like that, Lagnis boldly chewed on the chocolate she was holding, and her face instantly distorted.

“Ugh.”

“The raw material for chocolate isn’t sweet. This is bitter. The chocolate you ate… well, it’s a dish that’s made extremely sweet through a series of processes we commoners can’t possibly know.”

Well, the taste was no different from my previous life, and it was actually like that.

If it was when Lagnis was a noble, she might have spat it out right away, but now she couldn’t spit out food worth 5 copper coins and was somehow chewing and savoring the taste.

Is this why they let kids try cacao? It’s quite fun to see their reactions.

“Hmm… At first, I thought it was just bitter, but surprisingly, it seems pretty good. The fact that it’s not overly sweet… it might even be addictive?”

Contrary to my expectation of hearing complaints, Lagnis, who brightened up her expression faster than I thought, finished eating the chocolate very quickly as soon as she got used to it. Oh my gosh.

Still, I was satisfied that she seemed to be enjoying herself, forgetting the quite serious situation she was in.

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We wandered around like that for the next four days. There wasn’t much of anything new. After all, there was a limit to the excursion in a border city.

Still, eating this and looking around there, even Lagnis, who was stiff at first, naturally started to lean on my arm and pretend to be lovers quite well, and time was flowing as well as always, so it wasn’t so bad. While spending the day without fail like that, I was pondering what weird thing to feed Lagnis today.

-Bump.

“Ah.”

Someone passing by bumped into my shoulder. To be precise, it was just a brush while passing by. I don’t have a hobby of shoulder-bumping with people. But the following monologue was not ordinary.

Oh, it couldn’t be. Childish and obvious…

“Ugh, fuck, my shoulder is all stiff.”

The following muttering. Muttering? No, it would be more accurate to say it was a prelude to raising his voice.

It was a definite line of “that” to the extent that even adventurers passing by reacted immediately. Quick-witted adventurers were widening their eyes, expecting the upcoming squalid spectacle.

Yeah… If you want to nitpick, this is the glove thrown by nobles for a duel.

A line that plays a role similar to that glove in the world of delinquents…

Lagnis was walking and laughing, not even imagining that it would be directed at us, and I had no reason to intentionally stop, so I walked on my way while racking my brain.

Delinquent? Well. They don’t have the guts to act like thugs in an area swarming with adventurers. A pure lunatic with no relation at all?

There’s a possibility, but even those kids don’t usually mess with villagers. Why would they choose to do something that would get them caught by the guards for no reason?

“Have you seen this crazy bastard? Hey, you bastard! Can’t you see I’m wearing a sword?! My friend’s shoulder is shattered!”

By the time I had made that judgment, I was suddenly enlightened that there was no need to worry again.

Wait a minute? If they’re delinquents, I can just beat them up, and even if it’s an adventurer who picks this kind of nonsensical fight, I can just beat them up, and even if it’s someone hired by the noble faction we were targeting, I can just beat them up, right?

Along with the sudden realization, I felt like I could see the bad Eldmia and the even worse Eldmia smirking while swiping their noses.

It was an evil smile as if mocking me for worrying about something like a moron.

-Hehe, idiot.

-Hehe, moron.

Oh my… I’m laughing at myself for what I was trying to worry about. At the same time, I could tell that angry footsteps were approaching from behind, stomping steadily.

-Grab!

“Fucking ears are block…”

The moment a hand landed on my shoulder like that.

“Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!”

“Huh? Huh huh?”

“E-Eldmia?!”

I apologized to Lagnis in my mind, who was startled and terrified, and took action.

“Scaaaary!!! It huuuuurts!!!”

“Huh? Y-you, fuck, what are you…”

And with only the pure strength of a trained body, as soon as I twisted my body, I showed a man’s romance to the face that appeared.

Bending my waist, twisting my whole body, gathering all my strength into one fist, drawing in anger and passion, and swinging a true man’s punch.

Its name is! Galactica Phantom!

“Who the fuck are you, you fucking bastard?!!”

Whether it’s a telephone punch or whatever, you just need to hit them faster than they can react!

-Kwang!

The unidentified man, who had my fist stuck in his face, collapsed without even being able to scream due to the sudden impact, then belatedly started flailing.

“Ack, ack!!”

“Before you squeal like a pig, you should apologize to my shattered shoulder first, you delinquent bastard!!”

If you’re going to pick a fight, this is how you do it.

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