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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: bchen3
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Well, I understood what they were saying, but fuck, this isn’t puberty – you need to distinguish between reality and delusion.
At the same time as feeling bewildered, since he had shouted so loudly, all eyes around turned toward the madman.
But the more ridiculous part wasn’t over yet!
“As expected!”
“I too have reached the same conclusion! How truly remarkable, Sakagi-kun!”
Two scrawny, unfashionable men wearing striped sprite shirts tucked messily into their pants and thick-looking round glasses expressed agreement with the madman’s statement.
Moreover, one of them was speaking in what seemed like a historical drama or martial arts novel style, and for a moment I thought the automatic translator was malfunctioning.
“Finally.”
“Yes, finally.”
“Days of humiliation and oppression in this false life. Now it’s time to spread new wings in a true life.”
“Hehehe. This is getting exciting.”
…what the hell were these crazy bastards doing?
It was obviously an extremely serious situation, but were they filming some kind of skit in this situation?
For a moment, I thought Fatty, Weakling, and Nonjingu – this Doraemon trio – might be escaping reality out of fear in such an extreme situation, but.
“Then is it time for hidden powers to awaken?”
“With this kind of development, we might unexpectedly get an ordinary skill.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“It’s common sense that what was thought to be an ordinary skill turns out to be the most extraordinary. Isn’t a true cheat skill one that shines quietly in the mud?”
I lost consciousness at their continuing conversation.
This was really dizzying.
Honestly, I’d seen people doing roleplaying in online communities before, but this was the first time I’d seen humans roleplaying to this extent in reality, and in front of everyone no less.
No, if we’re talking about roleplaying, where one acts while being aware they’re playing a role, these guys were ‘real.’
I suppose this was truly Japan.
The problem was that some people among the crowd started saying things like ‘Is that so?’ and ‘certainly…?’ in response to what this Doraemon trio, still in puberty despite their age, was saying.
What do you mean ‘is that so,’ you crazy bastards.
The situation was already serious, but if we assumed this delusion might come true with an infinitesimal probability of one in infinity, it would be even worse.
This wasn’t good.
Including myself, those few who had maintained their sanity were aware of how serious the current situation was.
While the situation wasn’t normal to begin with, even thinking about it ‘normally.’
This situation was terrorism.
The game we had entered wasn’t the new model of the Connection series we were supposed to play.
Users dragged into an inexplicable game from the center of the convention hall.
If this were an airplane, it would be hijacking, and since this was a game, should we call it radio hijacking, or game hijacking?
This wasn’t some transcendent being from a fantasy novel, but terrorism by humans with clear intentions. A man-made disaster.
If nothing else, seeing how they had matched the sensitivity settings exactly to reality, the intentions of the person who committed this act were clearly readable.
Fuck… Just like Japan to make a real death game in reality.
Is this what happens when an otaku with actual abilities goes dark?
There’s a high possibility that the situation has been understood to some extent outside, so it might be chaos out there by now.
The problem was that in famous works dealing with this kind of situation, I seemed to remember there being devices that would fry your brain if someone tried to forcibly wake you from the outside…
‘This is fucked.’
Was this really going to be my first experience in Japan?
Anyway, putting aside such judgments, somehow this excited atmosphere with people grinning despite such a serious situation wasn’t good.
Since this was a game and fantasy, there was a high chance of cold weapons or magic being involved, and injuries like burns could easily lead to death from shock.
If the level design was shit like dog crap, the probability of death would be extremely high, and following the cliché, if a character died, there was a high chance they would really die.
Moreover, if this was done with hipster sensibilities playing with people’s lives, the probability wasn’t low that they had made the difficulty trashy like the Souls series.
Fun gaming and hardcore gaming had completely different outcomes.
Therefore, if tension was collectively released through otaku delusions like this, the probability of accidents was high. One could even say it was certain.
That meant meaningless sacrifices of precious lives who might die instead of me.
Although I didn’t particularly want to step forward, I judged that this was the timing where I needed to step up and handle the situation.
“Let’s stop this.”
“Hm?”
The Doraemon trio turned their heads at my words.
Ah, seeing these ugly peppers grinning with flushed faces made my mood plummet to rock bottom.
“Anyone can see this is a serious situation, so is this really the time to be fooling around?”
“Fooling around?”
The leader of the Doraemon trio, Fatty, tilted his head dramatically as if he didn’t understand what I was saying.
You know, that thing where cute Japanese female characters put their index finger on their lips and tilt their head.
I almost threw a punch at the feeling of maximum disgust rather than sensitivity, but this body was a professional among professionals who had dealt with fans for 11 years.
Barely succeeding in controlling myself, I opened my mouth.
“Isn’t your attitude too playful for a serious situation, talking about isekai developments and true life and such?”
“…Hah, this is why ‘newbies’ are…”
What? You bastard?
A guy who looks like he’d barely make it to Bronze-Silver even if he played games well is lecturing ME about being a newbie?
“Ah, right, you said you were a pro gamer from Korea? Aura, I think I’ve heard of it. But Korean, you might have been a pro gamer in Aura, but here you’re practically a complete novice.”
When I made a dumbfounded expression, Fatty clicked his tongue while wagging his index finger.
It’s not easy to make every single gesture this fucking annoying.
“Listen well, Korean. In Japan, when perfect conditions like this are met, it’s ‘common sense’ to conclude this is an ‘isekai summoning.’ Understand?”
This was the first time I’d seen someone seriously say such things in reality rather than putting on an act to be funny on broadcast.
It felt like my life’s most fucked up experiences were hitting new highs by the minute.
Looking around, fortunately, people seemed to be making dumbfounded expressions, suggesting they weren’t taking Fatty’s words seriously… or so I thought until I saw several people scattered throughout nodding ‘mm-hmm’ with folded arms, which gave me a bleak feeling.
Was this for real?
This was common sense?
Are you okay, Japan?
“If you understand…”
“You crazy bastard.”
The curse I’d been holding back burst out of my mouth.
Congratulations.
You broke my mind control that I’d maintained for 11 years to avoid giving haters any openings and to maintain proper behavior – and you did it in less than 10 minutes after meeting.
“What did you say?”
“I said you’ve lost it, Fatty.”
Now it’s time for Professor Kid’s lecture, you little shit.
“I don’t give a fuck about your otaku common sense, but thinking in normal common sense, does it make any sense that you’d lie down in a dive capsule and wake up to find yourself collectively transported to another world?”
“That’s…”
“Holy fucking shit. Space exploration projects are spending trillions and still struggling just to get to Mars, but you think a game company’s capsule can instantly send people across galaxies?”
“No…”
“When we haven’t even discovered another planet that can support life yet, you’re saying the capsule can precisely shoot you to some unknown planet with exactly the fantasy setting you nerds love?”
“…”
“Hey, you otaku bastard. Try using your brain. What’s more normal – thinking a game company’s new capsule is some over-technology machine straight out of sci-fi that can jump several billion light years to send humans to a world that’s perfectly habitable and just like Japanese fantasy that otaku go crazy for, or thinking something went wrong and we’ve been kidnapped into a game made by some crazy game developer?”
“Honestly, both…”
“Yeah, fuck! Neither is normal!”
When Fatty started whimpering under my fact bombardment, I yelled at Weakling who had come to support from the side.
“Sigh… And think about it.”
“…There’s more?”
“‘Menu’ ‘Status Window'”
A hologram appears before my eyes.
Though others can’t see it.
“Does it make sense to have hologram UI menus and status windows like in games in a world that actually exists? And in a fantasy setting at that? Even if there are infinite possibilities in the universe, this is already way too convenient as it is, but this crosses the line. If this were a novel, the retention rate would be destroyed by now with comments flooded with ‘Dropping this due to lack of plausibility and verisimilitude!'”
“…sob.”
As Fatty whimpered, Weakling and Jingu clung to him to comfort him.
While it was annoying to see a man cry over a few words of common sense facts, I felt a bit sorry and said:
“…Anyway, this isn’t a good situation right now. Rather, we need to stay tense and think carefully about how to deal with what’s ahead. …If you want to survive here.”
At those last words, the excited atmosphere grew heavy.
I’m sorry for shattering your happy delusions, but ignoring reality with fantasies won’t guarantee survival.
‘My bank account shows my account number instead of an amount. And I haven’t even spent it all yet.’
If reality outside was completely fucked, that would be one thing, but I didn’t think some madman’s shit game could replace the life I’d worked so hard to build outside.
‘I have to go back.’
To begin with, JRPGs weren’t even my taste.
If I had to choose a preferred fantasy RPG, it would be Company B’s Parchment series.
*Clap clap clap*
Amidst the heavy atmosphere, applause was heard.
Everyone’s attention turned to the source of the sound.
The King NPC waited until enough attention had gathered, then stopped clapping and opened his mouth.
“Honestly, I was feeling displeased because I couldn’t understand the previous conversation, but that last statement was quite to my liking.”
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