—————————————————————–
Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Nekorune
—————————————————————–
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
Living alone was a little stifling.
The cicadas chirping outside only added to my irritation.
Miyuki’s absence made it even more boring.
My friends were texting, but it felt like a waste to squander precious time that could be used to gain affection points…
Lost in thought as I lay in my empty room, I suddenly sat up.
That’s it! I’m going to the academy right now.
Miyuki might show up while I’m cleaning the bathroom.
She did sometimes stop by the academy to pick up things she forgot.
Honestly, it was a gamble, but it was worth a shot.
In dating sim terms, I was still in the very early stages of the game, and this is where I needed to diligently build my foundation.
So shouldn’t I employ every possible method to have encounters with the heroine?
With that in mind, I quickly changed clothes and headed to the academy.
Public transportation was relatively empty on a Sunday morning, so I arrived in no time.
Unlike the bustling academy during the week, the front gate was quiet.
“What’s going on… Huh? Matsuda-kun? Hold on.”
The security guard, who looked to be in his 40s, stopped me as I tried to pass through the gate.
He recognized me right away. Have I caused him so much trouble thus far?
As I approached him, I noticed his suspicious gaze through the open window of the guardhouse.
“I’m here to clean the bathroom.”
“Clean the… bathroom…?”
“It’s part of my detention duties.”
“Detention? Ah… you mean… the groping incident?”
“Yes.”
“They told you to do it on the weekend too?”
“They said every day, and if I miss a single day, I’m expelled. So, yeah, I guess that includes weekends.”
“Is that so…? Well, write your name in the visitor log first.”
I went into the guardhouse and picked up a pen. As I wrote my name, I quickly scanned the visitor log.
There were barely any visitors, as expected on a weekend.
Miyuki…
‘She’s here.’
Right above where I was writing my name, written in elegant handwriting, was Hanazawa Miyuki.
Today was my lucky day.
Did I get some kind of beginner’s buff?
After scribbling my name, I was about to rush out of the guardhouse when I paused and turned around.
Then, I casually said to the security guard,
“Have a nice day.”
“Yeah, you too… Huh?”
This must be the first time you’ve seen me say something like that, huh? Yeah, I bet it is.
Leaving the shocked security guard behind, I entered the academy and made a beeline for the first-year hallway.
Miyuki must be in her classroom right now, right? As much as I wanted to go find her right away, that would be too reckless.
The cameras would catch me, leading to unnecessary misunderstandings.
Fortunately for me, Class 1-A was right next to the staircase.
It was human nature to start cleaning from the farthest point.
If I made enough noise cleaning here, there was no way Miyuki would fail to notice me.
I grabbed a hose from the cleaning closet and got to work.
As I expertly cleaned the urinals and sprayed water into the toilets I had already cleaned yesterday,
“Matsuda-kun?”
Miyuki’s voice, laced with curiosity, reached my ears.
As expected of Miyuki. You never disappoint.
I turned around, internally cheering.
Miyuki was dressed in simple blue jeans and a white t-shirt.
A casual outfit, yet she glowed.
Suppressing my inner thoughts, I raised my voice slightly.
“Hanazawa? What are you doing here? Wait, hold on, let me guess.”
As I raised my index finger playfully, Miyuki crossed her arms with an amused look.
It was like she was anticipating what kind of nonsense I was about to spout.
We had come a long way in such a short time. She wouldn’t even talk to me before.
After a moment of silence, I said,
“You’re here to steal the midterms, aren’t you?”
Miyuki sighed, as if she expected nothing less.
“Ha… I can understand why that’s all you can come up with. To answer your question, I’m not like you, Matsuda-kun. Or rather, not even you would think of stealing exam papers, would you? You’ve chosen the wrong type of person to compare me with.”
Damn, she got me there. Her words stung because they were true.
Clicking my tongue, I asked,
“Then what were you doing?”
“I came to pick up something I forgot, and since it’s so nice and quiet here, I figured I’d study for a while.”
“And then you came here to see what was going on when you heard me cleaning?”
“You got it right this time. By the way, why are you cleaning the bathroom now?”
“Why? Because the old man…”
“You mean the principal.”
“…Right, because the principal dude said I’d be expelled if I missed a day.”
A faint smile touched Miyuki’s lips as she listened to my explanation.
“I don’t think he meant for you to come clean on the weekend… Is that why you came today?”
“Something like that. There’s another reason too.”
“Another reason? Are you worried the bathroom might have gotten dirty because people came to school on the weekend?”
You’re so innocent… You’d be surprised if you knew what kinds of things that bathroom has experienced.
I decided to give Miyuki a glimpse into the secret affairs that unfolded within the academy.
“Hanazawa.”
“Yes?”
“Geez, how naive can you be?”
“What do you mean?”
Looking into Miyuki’s innocent eyes, I clicked my tongue and began my explanation.
“Our academy has dorms. Right?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“There must be couples living in the dorms, right?”
“Yes.”
“And some of those couples might not have a lot of money. Am I right?”
“Well… I guess so?”
“Now picture this: it’s weekend night, and they don’t want to waste it alone in their dorms. But the boys’ and girls’ dorms are separated, and there’s strict supervision… Going out costs money. So what do you think those lovebirds do when they’re feeling frisky?”
Miyuki tilted her head slightly.
The way she pondered with her eyes looking upwards was incredibly cute.
After a moment, Miyuki asked,
“What do they do?”
“They come to the bathroom and ‘do it.’”
“Ah… Right… They… wait… WHAT?!”
Just as Miyuki was about to nod in understanding, she froze at my words and her jaw dropped.
Her face turned crimson in an instant.
I chuckled and drove the point home.
“Intercourse.”
As tempting as it was to do a little victory dance, that would only ruin the points I had painstakingly accumulated.
It was best to keep it at a level where Miyuki felt only a tinge of embarrassment.
“M-Matsuda-kun! Y-you’re taking this joke too far…!”
“Hey, I was just answering your question truthfully. Why are you getting so mad? Want me to prove it? If you go to the bathroom on the first floor, I bet you’ll find a clogged toilet. If you unclog it, you’ll find a condom…”
“S-Stop it…! I don’t want to know…! And you don’t have to be so graphic…!”
“What do you mean?”
“You know… that… thing…”
“You think the word ‘intercourse’ is too graphic? You’d probably faint if I said ‘sex’.”
“Matsuda-kun! You’re unbelievable…!”
Okay, time to stop.
You’re letting this slide because I’ve always had a dirty mouth.
Shrugging, I went back to spraying water into the toilets.
“Is your curiosity satisfied? Now scram.”
“Satisfied…? I’m going to tell the professor about this…!”
“What…? Are the students at this academy elementary schoolers? Middle schoolers? You’re going to forbid grown adults from having sex?”
“B-But this is an academy… Besides, the school rules clearly state… ‘Serious misconduct within the academy will result in penalty points’… If they’re giving out penalty points, it means it’s against the academy’s policy… so it’s not allowed…”
You know, those rules are meant to be broken, by you and me, in the future.
“Think about it this way. If it’s considered ‘serious’ misconduct but they’re only giving out penalty points instead of expulsion, doesn’t that mean the academy is somewhat understanding of youthful passion?”
Miyuki’s eyes widened at my words.
“I thought you’d hate the penalty point system, considering you break the rules like it’s nothing… but now you’re defending the academy?”
“Surprised?”
“Yes. Very.”
“Technically, I was defending the students, not the academy… but whatever… Let it go. And why are you being so uptight? You don’t have to act so stuck up all the time. Geez, what else can I expect from a goody-two-shoes class president…”
“I-I don’t agree with the penalty point system either. I was just… I said that out of anger… I was surprised…”
“That was a pretty detailed outburst for someone who was ‘surprised.’ You even quoted the school rules…”
“Stop teasing me… I’m serious…”
I know, I know.
I knew you weren’t actually that conservative.
“If you understand, then hurry up and leave. You’re distracting me from my cleaning. If you want to study, go to the library or something.”
“The library’s packed because of finals…”
“You should have woken up earlier. The early bird gets… you know… that thing…”
“The worm?”
“Yeah, that’s the one.”
“I don’t need that kind of advice from someone who doesn’t even know common proverbs.”
“You said the same thing on the subway! What, am I supposed to just shut up and never speak?”
“I was joking. Sorry if I offended you.”
Joking? You? To me?
Coming here today was the best decision ever.
Pushing down the sense of accomplishment that surged through me, I said,
“No offense taken, so just go. Or help me clean.”
“Okay. What can I do?”
I froze at her unexpected response.
“Huh…?”
“I said, what can I do to help?”
“…You’re going to help me for real?”
“Yes, I will.”
“For real?”
“That’s what I said. So, what should I do?”
Snapping back to reality, I pointed at the cleaning closet.
“Take that mop and mop the floor.”
“I’m offering to help out of kindness, you know? You should ask politely instead of ordering me around. Is it that hard to add a few nice words?”
She could have let it go, but she just had to add that, didn’t she? It was like she enjoyed teasing me.
Miyuki’s change of heart was playing out exactly as I had hoped, and I wanted to shout for joy.
Frowning dramatically, I said,
“You were the one who offered to help.”
“Matsuda-kun, should I just go?”
“…Are you having fun?”
“Should I?”
She turned her back on me and made a move to leave.
I called out to her in a panic,
“Hey… Hey…! I’ll say it! I’ll say it!”
Miyuki turned back to me and said,
“You must really hate cleaning, huh?”
I love cleaning! I want to clean with you while looking at your face!
I wanted to scream those words, but I held back.
“Who likes cleaning… Anyway… there’s a mop in the cleaning closet…”
“Yes…?”
“Could… could you wash it in the sink and… mop the… floor… please…?”
I could barely get the words out, my body trembling to emphasize my reluctance. Miyuki smiled brightly at me.
Her beautiful smile lit up the gloomy bathroom.
I felt faint.
“See? You can do it. From now on, try speaking like that. It makes the listener feel good, and it’ll make you feel good too, Matsuda-kun. Don’t you feel better now?”
“Not at all. Just hurry up and help.”
“Alright. I’ll get the mop.”
As she brushed past me, I caught a whiff of her refreshing grapefruit scent.
I sniffed the air like a creep without her noticing, thinking that today’s harvest was bountiful indeed.
From playful banter to help with cleaning and even verbal sparring… the mood couldn’t be better.
I should go make an offering at the shrine tomorrow.
I have to thank the gods for bringing me to the world of Doki Doki Academy.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
Improved relation