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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: FusionX
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Dissonance.
Was that the right word to describe this sudden, unexpected feeling?
Miragen looked at Robert.
Why did she feel like she had seen this moment before, this moment where she was talking to him?
Déjà vu?
No, it was more than that.
Words that sounded familiar, words she felt like she had uttered herself.
Overwhelmed by this strange, recurring sensation, she flinched slightly when she met Robert’s gaze.
His eyes, usually empty, but occasionally filled with a gentle light, now held a chilling glint.
“…That’s impossible. It never happened.”
“Of course. This is the first time I’ve called for you.”
Was this really the first time?
A hazy memory surfaced through her confused thoughts.
It was a jumbled, disjointed memory.
She couldn’t even remember what she was trying to give Robert.
She had wanted to give him something, but there were too many things.
“Miragen.”
A voice pierced through her confused mind.
She felt a hand on her shoulder, and realized she was trembling.
The memories flooding her mind made it difficult to focus on his voice.
Robert was also present in those memories.
“Ah, it’s alright. I think I was just mistaken. I was going to give this to you, brother.”
“I see.”
She forced a smile at his indifferent response and shrugged nonchalantly.
Perhaps she had been mistaken.
It was just a sudden delusion, wasn’t it?
The scenarios she had imagined were so ridiculous that she blushed, running a hand over her cheek.
If anyone knew what she was thinking, they would surely tease her mercilessly.
Robert whispering words of love to her?
Even though she had feelings for him, this was crossing a line.
She didn’t want to tell anyone, and she certainly didn’t want to say it to his face.
The hand on her shoulder was quite large.
She hadn’t been conscious of it before, but lately, she had become aware of every little detail.
At first, he was simply a grateful person who had helped her.
Then, he was a foolish person who had tried to save her.
Then, he was someone who didn’t contact her often, which made her feel a bit neglected and then?
Well, Miragen hadn’t thought about it seriously.
He seemed like a different person every time they met.
Sometimes he seemed like he would disappear if she looked away, and at other times, he approached her smoothly, as if he had charmed countless women.
He often crossed the line and stood before her, even when she didn’t allow it.
She couldn’t answer easily when she asked herself if she disliked it.
She had been accepting his advances naturally for a while now.
It was Miragen who would feel awkward and check on his mood whenever Robert didn’t approach her.
She sometimes wondered if their relationship as Princess and Duke’s son held a different meaning.
If he had always intended to become Duke, he could have excluded her.
He was cooperating with the Crown Prince, so he could have pushed her aside and strengthened the Crown Prince’s faction.
But why had he helped her? Why had he approached her first, instead of her brother?
She often pondered those questions.
It wouldn’t change anything now, but she knew there was something strange about Robert’s behavior.
He had nothing to gain from her.
So he must have approached her out of pure goodwill, but Miragen couldn’t understand what he saw in her.
“Robert.”
She called out softly, and Robert, who had been walking ahead, turned his head.
He looked much the same as in her fragmented memory.
Only a little colder, a little less cheerful.
He always seemed to wear a melancholic expression.
If she had to ask him something, it would be if he had ever confessed his love for her.
Robert had said those words in her brief memory, so he might have said it while she didn’t remember.
But the words wouldn’t come easily.
A grateful person, a foolish person, someone who made her feel neglected.
If her feelings for him developed into love, she wouldn’t know how to face him.
Perhaps those feelings had already blossomed, but Miragen decided to take a step back.
It wasn’t the right time yet.
They had only known each other for a few days, and Adriana… she didn’t simply consider Robert a friend either.
“What is it?”
“…I just called your name.”
He had turned his head when she called him in her memory too.
His expression was colder and more indifferent now, but Miragen once again saw her memories overlapping with Robert.
She didn’t know if it was a memory or her own embarrassing delusion.
Perhaps… it was a forgotten memory.
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I wasn’t sure what triggered the memories.
This had never happened before, despite all my regressions.
Was it because they had prolonged contact with me? Were certain individuals more susceptible to regaining their memories?
I didn’t know for sure.
But there were people I hoped would never remember.
That was why I was so surprised.
When Miragen asked if she had experienced something similar before, I desperately wanted to know everything she remembered.
But it would be troublesome if I revealed that I had experienced similar things, so I simply told her I didn’t know.
I hoped she would never remember, but I knew it wasn’t something I could control.
If I could control it, I would have done everything in my power to prevent it.
But these memories arrived without warning.
It happened to Theresa, and it happened to Adele.
I had forcefully triggered Yuria’s memories using magic and hallucinogens, but the Moonstone seemed to awaken memories in those who were deeply connected to me.
…I started to regret coming to see Miragen.
Even if it was a memory she would eventually recall, I wished it had been delayed.
Miragen’s expression was different from before.
She would stare at me and then blush, her reactions confusing me.
“It’s embarrassing to be stared at like that.”
I responded nonchalantly, and Miragen opened her mouth in surprise.
She seemed lost in thought.
I hoped she wasn’t thinking about the memories, but I was curious about how much she remembered.
It would be convenient if I could read minds, but unfortunately, I didn’t have that ability.
“Ah… I was just thinking about what happened earlier.”
“You were saying it felt familiar?”
“Yes, I was wondering if I had brought you here before. But I don’t think that’s possible.”
I paused for a moment at her words, then shook my head.
She had never brought me here.
Or rather, it had happened, but it shouldn’t have.
Miragen’s memories weren’t all pleasant.
It would be best if she could completely erase them from her mind.
Unlike Adele, who had very few memories, or Adriana, who had none, Miragen possessed a significant number of memories.
I wished they were all happy memories, but she had even killed me in one of them.
If she remembered that in our current situation…
I couldn’t guarantee she wouldn’t blame herself.
Miragen, confused by my denials, eventually sighed and nodded.
She seemed suspicious but not entirely convinced.
She blushed again when our eyes met, so I chuckled and spoke.
“Are you imagining something strange? You seem especially shy today.”
“Th-that’s not it.”
Her flustered response filled me with conflicting emotions.
I hoped that if she regained her memories, they would all be positive.
It wouldn’t be a bad thing if she only remembered the good times.
But if she only recalled the negative memories, I wasn’t sure she could handle them.
Those words, spoken by Miragen… she probably didn’t remember them, but…
If she remembered something like that, she would surely blame herself.
What would happen if she remembered beheading me?
I didn’t even want to imagine her recalling those memories while I wasn’t there.
“Anyway, I’ll use the gift you gave me. Hopefully, I won’t have to, though.”
“You can keep it as a decoration. I think it would be best if you didn’t use it either.”
“Then you should have given me something else.”
“I know, but…”
Miragen hesitated, glancing at me before continuing with a faint smile.
“I just… I wanted you to be safe when you use that sword. I was quite worried because you were injured when you came to save me. I looked for something that could help, and I thought this would be the best choice.”
Her words were different from before.
Instead of the woman who told me to think of her whenever I used the sword, there was a woman who was embarrassed to acknowledge her own feelings.
I nodded with a soft smile, grateful for her sentiment.
It would be impossible for me to stay completely unharmed and it would be just as impossible to forget about her when I used that sword.
I couldn’t predict what would happen after today.
Just as the current Miragen was a different person from the Miragen I knew in my past lives.
…Would Miragen regain her memories? Or would she fail to recall them and consider today a trivial event?
I couldn’t be certain.
I hoped she wouldn’t remember, but fate, like the wind, would likely blow her memories back to her.
I didn’t know for sure.
After all, this life was the first time I had experienced something like this.
If I wanted to know, I had to face it head-on.
I would only know after living through tomorrow.
If Duke Robert wanted to understand the 101st Miragen, he would have to spend more time with her.
As I closed my eyes for a moment, a cool breeze blew from the darkened sky.
It was a spring day, the winter long gone, the flowers in full bloom.
The gentle breeze seemed to soothe my troubled heart.
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