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Translated By Arcane Translations
Translator: Mod7
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While the first semester was usually focused on theory, there were still practical training sessions.
The ratio was roughly 6:4 in favor of theory.
Before starting practical classes, a series of tests were conducted to meticulously analyze each student’s combat abilities.
These tests covered everything: ability limitations, stamina, strength, weapon proficiency, marksmanship, and more.
The list was extensive.
Conducted over several days, these tests aimed to provide advice on areas for improvement and future direction.
And the practical classes were designed to help us apply this knowledge in real-life combat scenarios.
To cut to the chase, my marksmanship was abysmal.
I received a HACCP certification for being hopelessly incompetent.
‘As expected, I’m a top laner. Ranged combat doesn’t suit me.’
Hye-ji, on the other hand, displayed overwhelming combat prowess.
She hit the bullseye with nine out of ten shots in the marksmanship test.
The one miss was because she was caught trying to secretly shoot at my target.
The practical training sessions were a bit different.
The academy’s policy was to combine different classes for practical training.
Typically, it was Iron & Silver / Bronze & Gold.
This goddamn academy had thrown equality out the window.
‘You bastards, this is blatant rank discrimination!’
The academy had its reasons, of course.
They claimed it was to evaluate each individual’s achievements.
But the real reasons were different.
It was to instill a sense of superiority in the higher-ranked students and a sense of inferiority in the lower-ranked ones.
And to motivate a few select students by making them think “I can actually compete at this level.”
This was a truly Korean academy.
And the reason why they didn’t pair adjacent ranks like Iron & Bronze was also clear.
Well…
‘Students with adjacent ranks tend to look down on each other.’
It was based on a simple fact of life.
And big data, compiled from countless experiences, further validated this fact.
Take popular MOBA games, for example.
How do most people react when they see someone with a slightly higher rank?
With a competitive spirit?
No.
It’s inferiority complex and petty squabbling.
-That bastard’s worse than me.
-If it were me, I’d climb up the ranks in no time.
Some might deny it, claiming “I’m not like that!”
But everyone acts the same in champion select.
-Why are you picking Yasuo when you suck at this tier?
-This idiot played 1000 ranked games and still can’t get out of Iron? What a loser.
-I’m only in Silver because of bad teammates. My true skill level is at least Gold.
Forget fighting spirit, everyone’s just busy putting each other down.
Still don’t believe the adjacent rank theory?
Try playing a ranked game right now.
What happens when someone with a slightly higher rank on your team starts feeding?
You’ll see all kinds of trash talk, ping spam, and champion select insults.
At least nowadays, with the improved reporting system, verbal abuse isn’t as rampant.
‘Of course, I’m actually a Platinum player. It’s just bad luck that I’m stuck in Silver.’
Anyway, that’s how it is.
This wasn’t just a delusion.
The three years of getting beaten up by a crazy old man had its benefits.
I could handle it.
Even when fighting Silver-tier students, not just the Iron-tiers.
There was one particularly challenging student.
A bastard with an ability that stimulated your prostate every time he attacked.
Thanks to that asshole, I had to change my pants twice.
‘This has never happened before, even on dates, damn it.’
After a few practical training sessions against the Silver-tier…
I got a good sense of their abilities.
Ah, I understand now. Your level of skill.
It was so boring that I wanted to die.
*’Their ability to utilize their powers and rank is severely lacking.’ *
Take pyrokinesis, cryokinesis, or electrokinesis for example.
Their powers were genuinely strong.
But they acted carelessly, overconfident in their raw power.
They just spammed their ultimate abilities without even considering cooldown times.
Standing still? You’re asking to get hit, bastard.
There’s no 3-second courtesy rule here like in DNF.
There were also idiots who just mindlessly enhanced their physical strength.
Physical enhancement was certainly effective.
But there were many who lost their balance and fell flat on their faces.
And most couldn’t react quickly enough when I dodged their attacks and countered.
In the end, the Iron-tier students in my class were no match for me.
I even crushed all the Silver-tiers.
So, naturally, my sparring partner was switched to a professor.
“Hey Kim, shut your mouth and come at me.”
“Damn it. Why is a pro playing in the newbie zone?”
Professor Kim Pil-yong.
The hairless professor with a shiny head that glowed even in the darkness.
I thought it would be fine since I had already beaten him up before.
But there was a problem.
He was using his ability without holding back this time.
The Ability Reader had identified his ability as Cryokinesis.
A simple ability that froze anything he touched with his hands and feet.
‘Holy shit, what is that?’
His actions were simple.
He stood in a horse-riding stance and threw a single right punch.
The problem was what happened next.
The wind pressure from his punch flew towards me and suddenly created several giant icebergs right in front of me.
It seemed like he was using the air and moisture as mediums for his ability.
It might have been convenient for him, but it was a nightmare for me.
*’Admiral Akainu! Grant me the power to sever this baldy’s legs!’ *
Thankfully, the icebergs weren’t created simultaneously.
As the second iceberg formed after the first, I dashed through the gap between them.
I lunged towards Professor Pil-yong, my sword held in a cross grip, aiming for his heart.
But the number above his head had already increased by one.
Clang!
A wall of ice instantly formed in the path of my sword, blocking my attack.
The sword, deflected by the ice, grazed his left thigh.
‘He’s as shameless as he is bald.’
And the ice was spreading, encasing my blade.
As if to say, “I won’t allow you to advance any further.”
However, unlike before, it was still thin ice.
I could easily break through it.
I released the sword and slammed the pommel with my elbow.
The sword, propelled by the force, shattered the ice and plunged deep into his thigh.
Thud!!!
“Ugh!”
The red number above his head increased by one.
Did he see a future where I created distance?
It seemed like he hadn’t experienced this attack before.
I wasn’t stopping here.
I grabbed the hilt of the sword and swung it.
Slice
His left leg was severed cleanly.
The training ground system deactivated.
Professor Pil-yong scratched his head and said,
“You’re impressive. To be this capable as a non-ability user, that’s quite an achievement.”
“Why are you trying so hard against an Iron-tier student?”
“Iron-tiers are unpredictable.”
“True. Even I can’t predict an Iron Yuumi’s Q.”
He suddenly changed the subject.
His gaze was filled with undisguised lust.
“Speaking of which, would you like to have coffee with me in my office after class?”
“I’m not interested in being a research student.”
“Damn it.”
He clicked his tongue and went to supervise the other students.
In this world where even graduate students were legally considered human beings, becoming a research student?
Oh no, the research student is broken!
It’s been used for too long.
But it’s just property damage.
‘Where does that bastard get off trying to hit on me.’
Just then, I spotted Jung Ah-yeon training in the distance.
She was slowly pressuring her opponent with five summons.
Unlike before, when she just summoned a horde and mindlessly rushed in, she was now utilizing careful control and pressure.
‘I wonder if I could I beat her even if she can’t detect me because I have no mana.’
It would be difficult.
If I made any noise, she would know where I was.
And if she summoned a large number of summons and had them attack randomly?
I would eventually have to make a sound, whether I was blocking, dodging, or counterattacking.
‘This is going to be a pain.’
The thought of not being able to defeat Jung Ah-yeon alone made me feel uneasy.
At that moment, I noticed a Silver-tier male student trying to talk to an Iron-tier female student.
The number above the nervous male student increased by one.
Then, as if he had made up his mind, he walked towards the female student.
The female student blushed deeply as she noticed him approaching.
But she didn’t seem to dislike it.
I felt a surge of annoyance.
I couldn’t just stand there and watch.
Before he could make his move, I dragged him away and forced him to train with me.
‘This kid’s already trying to pick up girls.’
He looked absolutely miserable.
The red number above his head increased, as expected.
*’Trying to have a sweet school life? Not a chance.’ *
Before the training session ended, I handed him three broken maces.
In other words, I beat him up until three maces broke.
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A week had passed since the start of classes, with both theory and practical training sessions.
The following Monday evening…
I received a package.
I frowned, confused by the unexpected delivery.
What is this?
I wasn’t expecting a video or a USB from a rich young master.
Did a luggage carrier from some hero’s party send this?
Are you perhaps Uni?
I figured it was unrelated to me and opened the package without much thought.
If it’s an NTR video, I’ll just watch it and jerk off.
After all, I didn’t have anyone to NTR me.
But the contents of the package were different from what I expected.
There was a dark-colored coat wrapped in bubble wrap.
And a letter.
The letter was written hastily, with several words pressed hard into the paper.
[Brother, thank you so much. I was blind to your grand plan. Brother, I’m so fucking grateful.]
[Starting today, I will bow deeply in the direction of the academy once a day.]
[This is a coat I used to wear, but I showered it with deodorizer, so it doesn’t smell. You can wear it for a while and then throw it away.]
[It’s a small token of my appreciation, but I hope it will help you in the future.]
[Thank you again. Thank you. Thank you.]
[P.S.: Next time, cat ears and a tail, please. Brother.]
I had a hunch who sent it.
It was obvious.
‘…Fucking Old Man Kang-hyuk.’
The coat’s length was perfect for my height.
It felt a bit weird wearing something the old man had worn, but it was comfortable, so I decided to keep it.
I sent a message to Sister Ye-rim.
Me: [Sister, is maternity leave possible this time?]
Auntie: [Failed. I’m depressed.]
Me: [Cat costume with a tail. Guaranteed success.]
Auntie: [Shinwoo is a god! Thank you!]
Me: [Make sure to add a bell collar too.]
Auntie: [I’ll keep that in mind!]
And then I sent a message to Old Man Kang-hyuk.
Me: [Kitty cat play!]
Idiot: [You know I truly respect you, right, brother?]
Me: [I don’t have to give you a wedding gift later, right?]
Idiot: [I’ll give you the money, damn it.]
The more I wore the coat, the more I liked it.
It was a stylish item for a man.
So I decided to wear it to class the next day.
It was fine since there was a free dress code, so I confidently walked in with the coat on.
As I entered the classroom, I saw Hye-ji sitting in her usual seat next to mine.
She was still rocking the twin tails from the Jung Ah-yeon fight.
I guess her ability changed after that hairstyle, and she even made some money, so she was sticking with it.
‘Damn it, can I awaken my ability if I style my hair in twin tails too?’
Hye-ji waved at me as soon as she saw me.
Then, her eyes widened as she noticed the coat I was wearing.
“Huh? Huh? Huh? Shinwoo! Where did you get that?”
“This coat? An old man I know gave it to me. He said I could wear it for a while and then throw it away.”
“No way. Wait, can I touch it? Can I touch it, please, papa?”
“…Stop calling me ‘papa’, damn it. I’ll get arrested.”
I handed her the coat.
She immediately started flipping it inside out and touching it frantically.
“This actually exists? I’ve wasted half my life.”
“What is it? Why are you making a fuss over a coat I’m supposed to throw away?”
“Throw it away? Throw it away? Are you crazy? You’re going to throw this away? Are you out of your mind? Hey! are you going to throw me away too?”
“Why would I throw you away? Why does the conversation keep getting heavier?”
This was supposed to be a light novel, but the conversations kept getting serious.
Scared, I quickly steered the conversation back to the coat.
“So what is this thing?”
“You know my ability is to materialize weapons and combat tools, right?”
“Yeah, you showed off quite a bit, Hye-ji Stark.”
She was suddenly spouting random nonsense.
But her eyes were glued to the coat.
“But one of the combat tools I can’t materialize is the coat you’re wearing right now.”
“You’re more useless than I thought.”
“You bastard.”
She stared intensely at the coat, as if trying to burn a hole through it with her gaze.
She still wouldn’t make eye contact with me.
“There’s no public information about its design, structure, or materials. It’s a limited edition that will never be produced again.”
“Like a limited edition Gucci item?”
“Gucci items at least get resold on the used market! This thing would be auctioned off immediately!!!”
Finally, her gaze shifted from the coat to me, her eyes filled with longing.
She reluctantly handed the coat back to me.
“You know what a Defensive Coat is, right?”
“Yeah, you said it was a type of armor Hunters wear in the form of a coat during that theory lesson.”
“Actually, all the Defensive Coats currently in circulation are just downgraded versions. They’re imitations.”
“Imitations, fakes, whatever. As long as they protect as well as the real thing. Are you disrespecting Kaiki Deishuu-sama?”
“You crazy bastard! Why are you bringing him up?!”
Her anger flared up again.
But…
Koyomimonogatari is a masterpiece.
She sighed and continued explaining.
“Defensive Coats are consumable items. They lose their effectiveness after a certain number of uses or if they take too much damage.”
“And they’re expensive, right?”
“You just received one as a gift.”
“Saved a lot on initial investment.”
She continued fidgeting with the edge of the coat, seemingly reluctant to let go.
“Of course, the Defensive Coat you’re wearing will also lose its effectiveness eventually, just like the imitations.”
“So it’s just a first edition difference? Why were you making a fuss?”
“Listen to the end. Yours is the original. Even if it loses its effectiveness, it recovers after a certain amount of time, unlike the imitations.”
“…What?”
“Technically, it’s a first edition, semi-permanent Defensive Coat. Who the hell gave this to you?”
“What the…”
He gave me this precious item just because I helped him get a naked dogeza with a collar?
Is that old man’s brain made of his genitals?
He’s a pervert.
As I put the coat on, Hye-ji spoke in a serious tone.
“Don’t wear it too often. I might be able to tell it’s the real thing, but others might not.”
“Why should I hide it if I received it legitimately?”
“There are plenty of assholes out there who’ll try to sabotage you if they can’t have what you have.”
“Ah, right. There are a ton of those bastards.”
The world was filled with people who would rather drag someone down than work together to succeed.
And some even went out of their way to ruin other people’s relationships.
‘Why do they have to be such assholes just because they can’t have it?’
Of course, I wasn’t like that.
I’ve never sabotaged anyone’s relationship.
I was simply preventing students from engaging in inappropriate behavior during class.
Anyway, that was that.
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Shinwoo gets it, Koyomimonogatari is a masterpiece!
an upholder of public morals